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comment by OftenBen
OftenBen  ·  1659 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: May 13, 2020

I'm really losing it y'all. Things that were once helpful and calming are not any longer. I can't recall a time in my life when my self control was lower.

Another doxy.me appointment with the psych today. Likely more tranq inbound. :/





zebra2  ·  1659 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Is everyone going through a heightened anxiety period? I was the same way a day ago, and yesterday my fiancée had the same thing.

I hope it gets better for you. The last year or so has been plagued with anxiety for me, but things were actually pretty rosy during the shutdown until a few days ago.

goobster  ·  1658 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Yep. I'm having anxiety for the first time in my life. Chest seizing up... brain squirrels spinning madly on crazy shit... out of breath... tense all over... snippy and aggro with my wife... for NO PERCEIVABLE REASON.

Except... The World.

I'm coping with it by looking it straight in the eye, and giving it none of my life force or energy when I feel it get the upper hand on me. I just watch it spin and do its thing, and keep myself even-keeled, breathing, drinking water, and even meditating.

The best one was the other day my wife and I were on the couch, and I felt it coming on, and narrated the whole thing to her as it came on, tried to take over, and eventually passed. I was able to separate myself from it, and watch it happen. It was weird. And powerful.

_refugee_  ·  1656 days ago  ·  link  ·  

My resting heart rate is measurably elevated from mid-Feb and won’t go down to the rates I was hitting back then regardless of the health hacks I try. I’m forced to admit we just might be living in a more stressful world.

goobster  ·  1654 days ago  ·  link  ·  

The World needs to just take a fuckin chill pill and stop being so .... EXTRA.

Sheesh. We got LIVES we are trying to live here, people!! :-)

veen  ·  1658 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Best I can describe it is that most of the time my emotions are more mellow/muted, but that I have moments of despair / negative thought spirals much more than I've had before. Moments when I'm working and a song comes up and I just want to bawl.

A lower amplitude on average but larger dips in mood at times, so to speak.