Have you started that journal back up? :)

This quote tells us to step back and assess what exactly is causing suffering. I love it. Stoicism is kind of confusing to me, I haven't been able to find a satisfying summary of what it is, could you help out?

Wow.... That is so much fan engagement. Like, Those letters aren't a generic sentence. Wow.... How... Shes... OKAY I"M A FAN.

4am is really early. :( What kind of work do you do where you work from 6:30ish to 2? Did you choose those hours? What time do you get to sleep?

I want one but honestly I probably wouldn't use it. Seems like an excellent idea for people who might not be able to cook normally (but want to). Also people who tend to forget to turn off ovens...

I wonder how much the good natured doge community influences its stability. I've never seen a negative doge coin er.

I like Antonio Sanchez. He's the person who composed the soundtrack for Birdman. He's a Jazz drummer and I think he's fantastic.

This is fantastic. And addicting. damn you. :P

I love the idea of tabletops. I just haven't been able to find any groups, so I just dick off by myself with some various tabletop PDFs and let my mind wander.

Do you have any tips for finding a group?

What's a chronodeck?

What's your routine other than waking up at 5?

What's your playlist?

Could you link me to an example?

I didn't even like Jim Carry... He was way more overhanded than I'd've liked him to be.

My biggest takeaway from this is that I'm not the only person who does math and physics in pen. So many people call me crazy.

What are the poems?

I find Robert Frost excellent for memorization.

    Some say the world will end in fire
    Some say in Ice
    From what I've tasted of desire
    I hold with those who favor fire
    But if it had to parish twice
    I think I know enough of hate
    To say that for destruction ice
    Is also great
    And would suffice

I feel like this is a benefit of anonymity: People don't like to talk about their hardships that lead to change. It could be embarrassing, and no one likes admitting they were ever wrong.

I'm happy that you grew to understand what people like me go through.

When I'm depressed and stressed, I think about suicide as a way out. But thinking about suicide actually makes me more depressed, more hopeless.

Suicide used to be an option for me. Then I tried it- failed - and when my mom found out she cried so hard she vomited. I really love my mother. She's the person whose emotions I feel most in synch with. When she's in a bad mood- I can tell. When I was a kid, she could make me cry with a look of disappointment. My worst nightmares have always been dreams of her dying. So seeing her bent over the kitchen sink while I stood a few feet away crying through the numbness of my depression really changed my perspective on my own suicide.

I've experienced what most suicidal people never will - a taste of the aftermath of my death and I didn't like it one bit. So: Suicide is not an option anymore.

But the thoughts still come up again. It is overwhelmed panic where the only way out seems to be six feet down. The thoughts resurface, but that path feels as equally closed off as all the others, and I feel even more trapped like I am standing in a box barely big enough to hold me.

But at least I am alive. And at least my mom is happy.