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comment by insomniasexx
insomniasexx  ·  4206 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Cicadas begin their Staten Island takeover

They may sound amazing to some but I am sincerely happy that I'm not anywhere near them. They look big and mean.

I stumbled upon this yesterday and nope'd out of there after the first video. They are freakin' huge!

http://gothamist.com/2013/05/22/turn_up_the_volume_and_watch...

To be fair though, I am extremely anti-bug. I don't like spiders or gnats or anything creepy crawly. I shower with my glasses on after being attacked by a couple daddy long legs in the shower when I was 12. Perhaps this is where it stems from. I'm not scared of much but I cannot help but be shit-terrified of bugs. They make my heart race. I enjoy camping but it is a constant panic attack.

When I was living in NYC, I got fairly intoxicated and came home one night and immediately used the restroom. After walking a mile in heels, drunk, sitting on the toilet felt pretty fucking great. Suddenly out of no where something does a PING-PONG-PING crashing itself back and forth across the tiny NYC bathroom. I literally fell, still peeing, out the door which was directly in front of me. My roommate stuck his head out to see what the fuss was about but gave up after the sight he saw. I told him there was a flying monster in the bathroom. He shut his door and ignored me. Looking back, I would probably do the same to my drunk roommate who just peed all over herself and the floor.

I waddled downstairs to my basement room and put on a movie. 5 minutes later I hear EEEEEOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWW THUMP THUMP SLAM*

My roommate, who I learned was drunky-poo as well, had finished masturbating or whatever and stumbled upon the flying monster. So now we had two drunk 20 year olds, both barely wearing clothes (he had his hipster hulk briefs on, I had a tank top and boxers on) and a flying monster in the bathroom.

2 shots later, armed with 4 cups from the kitchen, we went on our mission. The beast was captured. A notecard was placed under the cup and two drunk half-naked idiots ran down the hallway of our apartment complex, screeching, to throw him outside. Unfortunately there was a bit of a smokers party right outside out apartment door so we had to run around them to throw the beast in the planter. When the dust had settled, we were now standing on a busy NYC street on a Friday night, adrenaline rushing, half naked, surrounded by people.





humanodon  ·  4206 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Oh, but cicadas just want to bone, lay eggs and then die. They don't have time to be mean. Plus, free protein, right?

These dudes on the other hand:

Are mean. And fearless. And are gross when you kill them. And, they don't like getting wet which means that in a country like Vietnam, where these guys are found, they seek shelter, like say in a house on the side of a mountain, which I happened to live in. Vietnam also has a rainy season that lasts about half of the year :(

In fact, many creatures don't like getting wet, like various species of large spiders and many kinds of snakes and lizards. I once got rid of a huge spider living in my closet by luring a leopard gecko into the space. A little lizard poop is worth not worrying about putting on a shirt only to have a large, hairy, inconveniently venomous spider scramble over the skin and out of harm's way.

I choose the cicadas.

EDIT: I forgot to include scale. That animal is about 20cm long, or about 8 inches.

thenewgreen  ·  4206 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Is that a cricket? A harmless, little, disney top hat wearing, cricket!! That's what terrified you in to the streets of NYC in your PJ's?

Wuss.

AlderaanDuran  ·  4206 days ago  ·  link  ·  

How bout something that's really worth being grossed out by? A Mayfly Storm.

Just to creep you and others out, and also give a bonus 80s throwback time-machine video to this bug-hating. The Minnesota 1987 Mayfly "storm". They were piled feet high in areas around the rivers and bridges (they hatch in the water and tend to stick near it), and at one point the state started using snow-plow trucks to start clearing them from roads...

http://www.kare11.com/video/default.aspx?bctid=1738226228001

I was alive for this, and remember it only in my nightmares. I was on a boat on the Mississippi during this mayfly storm. We stayed indoors all night, but the next day there was literally piles of mayflies all over the boat, docks, parking lots, roads, etc. It was the most disgusting thing I've ever lived through. The stupid bastards all hatch at once, and only live for a day or two, try to mate, and then die. It's the grossest orgy I've ever been a part of.

Also love the 80s cars and hair in this video. Totally made my night looking this event up.

humanodon  ·  4205 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Termites do this too, in different parts of the world. Usually they hatch after the first heavy rain of the rainy season. After they fuck, they die. Then, there are ants everywhere, carrying much of the mess off.

thenewgreen  ·  4206 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Wow, that was awesome! And not just because of the bugs, but also because of the 1980s flashback. We have Mayflies every year up in Charlevoix MI. Some years are worse than others but I've never seen them pile up on the roads 2 feet deep. That's just crazy.

ButterflyEffect  ·  4206 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I completely agree with you, as little bugs as possible is a good thing. I can deal with an occasional spider since they kill other insects that I dislike even more, such as mosquitoes. But as a whole, no bugs please. The whole Cicada thing is cool as long as it's not happening near me.