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comment by lil
lil  ·  4328 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: How to not be a creep

People don't realize when they are being creepy or boring. Should we tell them directly? Here's a blog I wrote last year on this topic. As for rozap's comments, I'd really love to see a list of tips to women who

    often assume interest in normal, mundane conversation.




thenewgreen  ·  4328 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'd love to read "Ma Bells Revenge", and I agree that some people need to know that they are acting inappropriately. That said, should we really be making posters saying "don't throw telephones"? Can we agree that these men are the exception, not the rule? I think perhaps this is rozap's overall point. By making such posters, it assumes that these are the default behaviors of most men.

rozap  ·  4327 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Exactly, we should tell them directly. It's more effective, and it renders sweeping generalizations like the original post unnecessary.

People need to be more direct. I'm not a confrontational guy, but I recall one time at a bar I was making polite conversation which by no measure suggested I was interested (like, talking about the weather or something while waiting in line for a drink) and the girl made some comment along the lines of "sorry, I don't hook up with guys I meet at bars" and I was pretty awestruck by her leap in thinking. So I told her directly, "Don't flatter yourself, honey". Definitely blunt, perhaps a little rude, but I'd like to think it made her reconsider her stupid behaviour. The same bluntness needs to be directed towards a lot of men.