Like I told randomuser ... So that's good, as far as the medication goes, I know quite a bit about them because, I've had to deal with so many medications for so long. My psychiatrist has signed off on my ability to use the right medication during the right times to mitigate symptoms. He also believes that I should keep this quiet from my pain doctor - well let, him know I struggled after surgery but was able to work it out / manage it but, not to go overboard with unnecessary details because, I can't have him kicking me out of the program. I truly need a basic script and have a need for it. So yah.I have my flaws, and I'm sick of being strong, but being strong is something I'm good at so I'll work through these and this even though I have feelings of self-doubt, self-hate, and worthlessness.