This comment is offensive as death to someone who grew up with a narcissist. "How dare you hate someone for beating you every time you made a mistake? You should just take it and be happy someone is allowing you to live at all." Id sooner be dead than grateful. And im an accomplished chemist, not a kid heading into college. Parents do not always have their children's best interest at heart, and to suggest that this is all in his head is condescending and the primary reason children get stuck taking the abuse. I also had to pay my way through college, and I now have a phd. That was piss easy compared to standing the abuse. You really have no frame of reference here.
"How dare you hate someone for beating you every time you made a mistake? You should just take it and be happy someone is allowing you to live at all."
-Not sure who you are quoting there, but it's certainly not me. to suggest that this is all in his head is condescending and the primary reason children get stuck taking the abuse.
Please show me where I said this was all in his head. I also had to pay my way through college, and I now have a phd.
Great. You really have no frame of reference here.
If you read the conversation I had with OP you will see that I say as much.
I believe Joilnt is quoting the narcissist who 'raised' them. But I've got to say their gaining a PhD through their own efforts really is great -- a person raised in such a toxic environment is going to have severe doubts and anxiety about whether they will be able to achieve this themselves, so having anecdotal evidence to support that it is even possible can be very helpful.