a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment by shiranaihito
shiranaihito  ·  3428 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Me [31 M] with my girlfriend [29 F] of 3 years, am I wasting her life?

    You've obviously in the "good enough" basket, warts and all. That's something.

That's something, but not much. Why would being deemed "good-enough-for-breeding" be enough for the guy himself?

    Make sure she wants you to marry her for the right reasons

How do you make sure, when she'll most likely just be telling him whatever he wants to hear? For all we know, her real reason might be the awareness that she's too old to get anyone "better" anyway, so she's decided to settle and proceed to breeding as soon as possible.





Idonknowwhattodo  ·  3427 days ago  ·  link  ·  

She's a catch, it's not like she wouldn't have other options (from my POV).

shiranaihito  ·  3427 days ago  ·  link  ·  

But she's 29 years old, which means any alpha male will just go for someone younger, especially when choosing a long-term partner, and she knows this.

Idonknowwhattodo  ·  3427 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'll take that as a compliment. But I don't think I'm that alpha.

shiranaihito  ·  3426 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'm not sure how you interpreted that, but basically the idea was that now, at 29, she'd have a hard time getting an alpha male, and it would be just about impossible to get one to commit to her.

I'm very much not alpha either, if it's any consolation :)

matjam  ·  3425 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'd go for a 29yo and I'm ALPHA AS FUCK. As long as she had a good personality of course.

shiranaihito  ·  3424 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Are you 50 years old then?

matjam  ·  3424 days ago  ·  link  ·  

no ... I was being sarcironictastic.

shiranaihito  ·  3423 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Good for you