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comment by coffeesp00ns
coffeesp00ns  ·  3430 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: At Age 3 — Transitioning From Jack To Jackie : NPR Ed : NPR

I met a 4 year old whose grandmother brought them to the Trans support group I was going to. They repeatedly, over and over, insisted they were a boy. I don't fall into this narrative, I figured shit out later in life, but I've known kids of a variety of ages, and they all knew who they were very, very solidly. there was no "wishy-washyness"

The difference between what you told your mom and dad, versus what these kids are doing, is Sustained behaviour. This is not one day I'm a girl, one day I'm a boy, it's behaviours like pressing down to hide genetalia, it's repeated, consistent insistence on "girl" clothing, or "boy" clothing, and several other indicators. (specifically the quoted text from the DSM-IV on that page)

Do they understand the societal ramifications of transitioning? No, it takes experience to learn that you're going to be hated for something you can't change about yourself. But they do know who they are.

    I really hope they don't do anything permanent until the kid's old enough to make that decision.

As it stands currently, the only thing that can be done until the age of consent (16-18, generally), is to put a child on Puberty Blockers. All this does is stave off puberty until the child is of legal age to make the decision. If the child decides not to transition, then all they have is a late puberty - no fuss, no muss. Up until puberty, kids look pretty similar, so generally no action is taken except to let the child societally present as the gender they prefer.





Plecko  ·  3429 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Thanks for giving your opinion, I'll be the first to admit that I'm ignorant of their plight

My opinion is not so much based on issues with transgenders right to transition, but trepidations on children being allowed to do things they could regret that are not repairable.

I didn't know about puberty blockers, that seems like a good compromise. Thanks for writing all that out.

Super_Cyan  ·  3430 days ago  ·  link  ·  

That's a really interesting way of looking at it. Like there's always kids out there that want to be fire trucks or attack helicopters or something that's just overzealous, and I thought that gender identity with this was the same thing.

I figured that it was just them going "I'm a boy!" and that's about it. I never knew that some had sustained behavior that made what they wanted something they actually believed - rather than a phase that they went through.

I think the puberty blockers are a pretty nice middle ground. One one hand, if they realize that they didn't want to transition, they wouldn't have to try to reverse everything. On the other, if it's what they actually want, they can just go ahead with it when they're allowed to consent. Something as life changing as transitioning shouldn't be something that people just wake up one morning and decide "Hey, I'm going to be a guy from now on." There's social ramifications. There's years of treatment. It's not like going "I'm going to be a cyclist." - it's a lot more serious. As an adult, you should be trusted to think through your actions, but I can understand why you wouldn't want a 15 year old to make such a large decision while they're that immature (yet, we plan their whole lives over the decisions they make at that time period). If you put the decision off, while keeping them, essentially, a blank slate, it can help then think about their decision without having to force them through as much misidentity (from themselves).