Totally. I wasn't telling you not to. I meant what I said to be a form of solidarity, not admonishment. Apologies if it came off incorrectly. Hard to gauge tone in text, ya know.It's nice sometimes to put some of it out there.
No problemo bb. Complicated subject, many thoughts and feels, and appreciate the validation. It just felt like you were telling me I didn't have to explain (which you were) and I was like "Oh but, I think part of this is that I want to!" IRL if I tell a casual friend or family member I don't want to have kids because I think I'd be a shit mom everyone is just like "OH NO YOU WOULDN'T" and then they coo about it, and I'm like "Dude, you guys really do not know who I am, and you're saying that because you think that everyone wants to be a mother and a good one at that." It's similar to my mother telling me I just need to raise my dating standards while I sit and think, "maybe I really am not looking to find anyone to settle down with; aka I make the dating choices I do because I am not interested in anything permanent."