Weddings are a delight. With all the free grub, booze and dancing, not to mention the occasional show of entertaining (if a bit embarrassing) drunken drama courtesy of Uncle Bob or Aunt Daisy or fourth cousin Jimmy, weddings are indeed a handful of fun.
I'll admit, I have been to every one of these types of weddings, to a degree. There is one major one that is missing though: "The religious wedding." I just attended one of these. There was a long, very Jesus-y ceremony and then lot's of crackers and fruit, lemonade and iced tea, chicken dance, no booze and no fun. It was pretty horrible. Luckily, my brother and I snuck in a flask. Iced tea and bourbon. It's amazing how much money people spend on weddings in the US. Is it like that everywhere? I was talking with a guy last night that told me his in laws are working second jobs to save money for their other daughters wedding. It's going to be between $30 and $40k -That's just stupid.
Once upon a time I was engaged. During this time period I did some research into the "average" wedding. Turns out the "average" wedding costs $35k. Fuck everything about that noise. I'd so much rather have a down payment on a house than a wedding. I've decided if I ever do get married, here are my requirements/desires (and don't make fun of my short list, it has taken me a very long time even to get this far. I was never one to daydream about my wedding day). - backyard wedding - booze - all my friends - dancing That's all I can imagine I would want. I assume I would probably wear white and have a dress of some sort but frankly I don't even know what I would want it to look like. I would just want everyone to have a whole ton of fun.
By most peoples standards we had a very modest wedding. We didn't want one to begin with, we wanted to elope but parental pressures caused us to have one. We took the money we saved and the money that was gifted to us and socked it away in mutual funds. Then, 6 years later had enough to put down 20% on a very nice home, a home I just sold on Trulia's "make me move" section. I made out pretty well. So, your plan to not have a huge wedding but to save your $ for a downpayment is a good one. It's worked well for us.
The last person I dated and then broke up with - in the course of breaking up we had a conversation about values as we felt ours were pretty drastically different. He admitted he didn't even know what my values were. "Logic, maybe?" he asked. I smiled.
When I was a kid, I remember that all of the weddings in my family had this thing called a "dollar dance," in which you could pay $1 to dance with the bride. Most people put in $20 or $50 for the pleasure. The groom would hold a bag that the money would go in. He pimped out his bride, essentially.
Well, that is kind of where these traditions come from. Note that dowries/bride prices are prevalent around the world and that marriage was essentially an economic decision for centuries, until the Romantic period where "romantic love" took root as an idea. Personally, I would have no problem marrying for economic purposes (in my favor, naturally) provided I was allowed at least one mistress . . .
Haha. one imagines that if the mistress was romantically interested in humano at some point she would become disappointed because he is married and therefore obligated to someone else, which could prevent long-term relationship future. Hence, she would attempt to move on, and poor humano would need a new mistress.