Girlfriends are good that way. I've been thinking of doing a blog on the question: Should I clean my boyfriend's apartment? I expect it will be as popular as "Should I Lend My Boyfriend Money?" which my blogger stats tell me has had over 100 hits this week.
My brother is in college and last year lived with three other guys, all on the baseball team. His direct roommate, the one who's bed was 2 feet from his - was a bit of a slob. All boys in college are slobs, but particularly those who are going to a high ranking university and waking up a 5am to work out and not getting home until after 10pm batting practice. They would often get fairly healthy take out on their way home, or leftovers the mother's would bring all the boys on the team. Because of this, the space between the roommates bed and the wall was littered with empty, or almost empty, styrofoam containers and empty cups. The room in general was messy - cups, take out containers, empty water bottles or cups, a never ending pile of clothes, etc. I remember accidentally discovering a sea of empty vodka bottles under a pile of winter clothes in the closet. My brother's girlfriend and my brother's roommate's girlfriend were quite close and so for the roommates birthday they decided to clean the room for them. My brother lent her the key and they got down and dirty cleaning the place. She laughed that it was rancid and getting to science-experiment status. But they cleaned it all out, vacuumed, and when the guys returned to the dorm that evening, it was just about the best birthday any college boy could have ever asked for. I've never met a guy who likes to live in a dirty or messy place - just that they have better things to do than clean. Having a girlfriend can certainly give them the inspiration they need to actually clean up. I've found that once it gets to a certain point, it's easier to add to the mess than to undertake such a huge operation. I'm certainly glad that my boyfriend and I are on the same page regarding tidiness and cleanliness.
I love having a clean living area, but I also like having my own space where I can do my thing. If I'm writing a lot, then I like my environment to be the one that I've built up during the process of the work, you know? I cannot abide a cluttered or dirty kitchen though. Bedroom, desk, sure. Kitchen and bathroom? Nuh-uh. When I was in college, I would usually wait to see if there was someone (usually homeless) who regularly collected bottles for the deposits. Then, I'd introduce myself and make an agreement that they could have the empties. A couple of apartments full of college guys can make sure someone has enough money to get a meal or stay warm pretty easily.
There's a big difference between tidiness and cleanliness. I can have a bit of a messy place - books out, papers, out, pile of semi-dirty clothes on the chair, etc. But hair and toothpaste on the mirror and dirty dishes or sauce on the counter - nope. My parents house since my brother and I have moved out has become so immaculate it doesn't feel lived in anymore. I opened some leftovers and some condensation dripped onto the counter and I had to go and get a paper towel to wipe it up because it seemed so out of place.
Yes, exactly. But, the two often go hand-in-hand, in both directions. I once read that "neat freaks" or, people who care more about clutter than cleanliness, tend to spend more time organizing and re-organizing than is worth the effort, if the space is used regularly. I wonder if it's true, or just something I latched on to, to justify the way I like things.There's a big difference between tidiness and cleanliness.
Sounds like this is a question that deserves it's own askhubski entry -- should be pretty funny given that a substantial group of hubski are male ages 15-34. -- maybe it should have a male ring to it: Would you let your girlfriend clean your apartment? -- or on a larger topic: how do you and your partner negotiate a liveable space? ... although that's a whole other thing (or is it)? maybe: Do you resent it when someone else cleans your space?
If the girlfriend is new and she starts cleaning, my hackles are raised. If we've been together for a while, then if she starts cleaning, usually I start cleaning. That way I can put the important stuff away myself so I don't lose track of it. Women can be messy too though, so it's kind of a roll of the dice with that.
The big sadness of my life is that my beautiful daughter is threatening to move to a dumpster if I make her clean her room. (She lives in a different city from me in a house that she and three others rent from me, so as a "landlady-parent" I can still insist on a clean room). My response is this: Moving to a dumpster would probably be an improvement over your room. (Besides, she might run into BLOB_CASTLE.)
It's not as bad as you might think in here. Just put on some gloves and you're all set!
BREAKTHROUGH: A short essay on Dysfunctional Parenting 101: The junior unit ran out of money -- so she took up my offer on a clean room in exchange for October rent. Keep it clean and November is on the house as well. (note - she's had an offer of free rent all along if she would let me help her make a budget - but she turned that offer down (so instead I've been supplying her with food and bus tickets). The reason for my caution is a couple of years ago she gave all her money to a boyfriend. We are still recovering from the nightmare that he was.
Dang lil, how many houses do you have?! Sorry, that's rude. I think living with roommates can create a laxness that the individuals might not have otherwise, in regard to cleanliness/tidiness, if only to ensure that people coming over or dropping by will have a place to sit. I'll admit that it's taken me a long time to get to where I am now in regard to my attitude about the topic, but I think it was necessary for me to take that time. Oddly enough, my typical "uniform" (or the clothes people see me in most often) came out of that process. In college, I would often have to make decisions like, "if I buy smokes, then I can't do laundry" or, "if I get one more beer, then I can't do laundry." So, I didn't do much laundry. However, I went to school in downtown Boston, close to the shopping centers. Whenever I was about to run out of clean shirts, I would go down to Filene's Basement or Marshall's or whatever and buy a package of white t-shirts, whatever brand was cheapest. So, I was almost always wearing a white t-shirt and blue jeans. When I finally got around to washing my clothes, I . . . well, I don't want to say how many white t-shirts I had. Let's just say that when I had a housekeeper and I explained why, she smacked me and then laughed for a long time. Even now, I prefer them, though I also wear solid colored t's. It's a pretty good go-to for me (I think).
"The bank is a HUGE partner in all this. My current spousal unit has been an entrepreneur and visionary from time to time. I was living in a dump(ster) when he met me. Hubski, however, is the great equalizer. Houses, housekeepers, we're all just text on a screen. However, tonight I made buttermilk-cheddar biscuits which were fluffy and flakey. I've been reading about biscuit secrets -- I believe it was your recipe that got me going in the first place. The biscuits were to accompany my fish chowder made with fresh haddock, perch, tilapia, potatos, carrots, onions, leek, frozen peas, and one can of Campbell's clam chowder.how many houses do you have?!
It depends on what you mean by "have."
The thing with biscuits is, that they're easy enough to make, but you have to make them enough times to get the feel for how to make really great ones. Then, they become easy enough to make that you way as well make some, for whatever reason. If nothing else, making biscuits is good motivation to work out!
Oh no, no euphemism. When I lived abroad, I had a housekeeper who came 6 days a week and did the floors, did the washing and ironing and all kinds of other stuff. Great lady. I paid her a fair wage and did things like paid her medical bills and got her a phone. In return, she took good care of me and made sure that when I was going through a rough patch, that I wasn't burning the candle from both ends too often.