I have a recurring dream that one or both of my cats run away. I'm not sure what that means I'm afraid of, but definitely something. Losing control, perhaps??? I spent my adolescent years terrified of flying. I loved to fly as a kid, and I enjoy it now, too. But I had an anxiety attack on a plane when I was 14 or 15 (I don't know what sparked it, but I was doing a lot of LSD at the time), and for the next 5 or 6 years, even the thought of flying scared me. No joke: I fixed it with alcohol. I would get shitfaced on planes, and then I wouldn't get the anxiety. But then I realized that the whole thing was chemical to begin with, and after that epiphany the fear went away. Now I get drunk on planes for pleasure and boredom, not fear :)
My cat, who was older than me and had always been there for me just recently passed away. She was my first friend and mentor, and white as the snow. On the night she passed, I had a fever dream and had hallucinations of her and out time spent together in vivid years from 10+ years back. I had no idea what the dream meant, until I found she passed in her sleep of old age. It's still hitting me hard, but I'm telling myself the truth: she lived a great life..
I have a recurring dream that one or both of my cats run away. I'm not sure what that means I'm afraid of, but definitely something. Losing control, perhaps???
Let's imagine that the cats are a projection of yourself. If you were to be the cat in the dream and ask it 'what do you need?' or 'what do you want?' it would probably say "freedom" or "more food" or "adventure." If those are things that you want too, then that's what the dream might be telling you.
Perhaps the cat running away is more literal? Could that cat represent an actual person? I've only begun to realize the last few years how pervasive the fear of flying is. I work with several people that have to travel often and are terrified of it. One woman has to take either Xanax or lots of alcohol or combination thereof to curb her fears. She hates it. Another woman that I work with will opt to drive instead of fly. One time she drove from Arizona to Chicago for a meeting. Now that's just crazy! But her fear is so strong that it made more sense in her opinion. I'm glad you were able to get over this fear, traveling is such a wonderful thing that it would be a bummer if a component of it was anything less than kick ass.
I actually love flying. I love airports, and the steady stream of people crossing paths. So many have a sense of urgency, they're each one a 'story.' Also, enclosed spaces don't bother me...if anything it's the opposite and I find them comforting. At least I used to feel that way about flying. While I'm in no way scared of it, a lot of the magic is gone in these days of TSA heightened security. You no longer get to see people step out of the gate to a greeting by their family members or friends. TSA lines are now unpredictable in their size. They can be 1 minute long, or an hour and a half. This creates a situation where you either show up just in time and are stressed the whole time, or you get there incredibly early and just sit at the now cordoned off gate bored out of your mind. The new baggage fees and the trend to charge for carry ons is also annoying and just makes you frown. Contributes to the overall feeling of being nickled and dimed to death as you're shoved into a tube. Ha. Maybe I'm just bitter because I had a terrible experience this past week flying Spirit back from Las Vegas. Sleeping in an airport hallway will do that to you I guess :) Shame on me for flying Spirit again though, when I swore I never would.
or you get there incredibly early and just sit at the now cordoned off gate bored out of your mind
I am chronically early for flights. I often find myself sitting there for an hour prior and I love it! There aren't many times I get to be by myself, listen to music and do the kind of people watching that airports provide. Airports are wonderful places. People are at heightened levels of both joy and misery. Long planned trips to see loved ones, flying home for a funeral, their dream vacation in Paris etc. You can see it on their faces. I've written some of my best stuff while in airports. I also love airport bars. Airport bartenders know that they'll never see you again. There's no pretense, its awesome. Food and drinks come fast. I love airports. I love listening to some good music and going through the crazy tunnel at McNamara in Detroit, or sitting in the rocking chairs in Charlotte or putting a $20 bill in a slot machine in Vegas (only money I'll gamble while there). Airports are great.
| I also love airport bars.| I love the idea of them, yet every time I'm actually in an airport and could go to one, the thought of consuming alcohol then getting on a plane turns me off for some reason. The two don't quite go together. I love the idea of drinking in an airport bar when you don't have to fly, but sadly, you can't do that anymore since they are beyond security checkpoints.
Airports and consuming alcohol just seems like such a natural thing to me. I don't "get drunk" when flying, but I do like to have a beer or a drink prior if I have time. As for the checkpoints and greeting and seeing off people, I agree 100% with that. The RDU airport is nice because you can park your car for up to an hour for free and though you can't be "at the gate", you can be at the other side of the checkpoint waiting, which is close to as good. Close.
It was a fucking nightmare and I will NEVER fly it again if I can help it. The only situation where I will is if no other airline offers a flight at a proper competing time. I have to fly out to NYC and Vegas at different times during the year under pretty tight constraints as far as what days and what time of day I leave, but outside of that I will happily pay extra. You end up paying either way since they charge you for carry ons (40$ per bag), inconsistently apply their 'personal item' rule (had my personal item changed to a 'carry on' and charged by staff when I've taken the same container on multiple other flights and stashed under seat). As you mentioned, I've run into delays on more than one occasion, and they space their seats closer together in coach than other airlines. I could go on. Definitely my bad though. Ugh.
On the other hand, Xanax and alcohol is pretty amazing in combo, so at least there's that. But I think a fear of flying is so pervasive, because its a combination of no control with claustrophobia, two of the most common fears. You put them together and its too much for some people.
On the other hand, Xanax and alcohol is pretty amazing in combo, so at least there's that.
no doubt! Maybe not the best combo just prior to a national business meeting though. Hard to be at your best. But a fine combo indeed.
No, you can't really think straight, so you better fly the night before if you're headed to a meeting and you need drugs to fly. Next time you're on a plane look around you at takeoff and every time there's significant turbulence. You will see people sweating, clenching fists, etc. When you know the signs, they're really easy to spot. The worst thing for me, almost as bad as the anxiety itself, was having to hear my brother rip on me to no end about it. What are brothers for, I guess?
I would definitely give my brother shit if he were in the same situation. -And I would expect he would me. I flew to Austin last year and had a 50 year old woman sitting next to me. She warned me in advance that she was a "bad flyer". She grabbed my arm several times in fear. She was sweet and I talked her through it. Her way of handling it was to talk incessantly. Normally this would be obnoxious but she needed a friendly ear. Turned out her son was some tech-dude and I met him at the terminal. He gave me passes to a tech fair going on near my hotel. I went, thinking serendipity had struck and that I'd get to meet all sorts of interesting people. -It sucked. My only reward was being a good samaritan. -Man could she talk though.
Foot odor issues? I know that the TSA catches a lot of flak for being obtrusive, obnoxious and with little impact (and it is) but it doesn't bother me. I've got it down. The only thing that I find slightly annoying is that no airport ever has enough seating near the TSA exit for puting your shoes back on etc.
I'm very private about my possessions. I hate people touching my stuff, I hate people using my things, and I hate having things examined. Its the point where, even if we were dating, you aren't allowed to use my phone unless you really need to make a call or its an emergency. That, and I have the view that the TSA is a tremendous violation of my rights against unwarranted searches of my persons and property, and the opposite of what our justice system is founded on here in the United States. Innocent is the default assumption, but when you walk through the TSA checkpoint you are assumed to be guilty until they find nothing on you. Also I have a deep mistrust of people in uniform who aren't in the military or who aren't cops telling me to walk through checkpoints with my shoes off and everything I have with me in a bin to be scanned. Its too much the feeling of being a number, and while I'm able to accept a great deal of dehumanization, something about that is just a tad beyond the line I've drawn.
I can get most of that, except the phone thing. Is there any rational reason why you wouldn't want somebody to use your phone? This doesn't qualify as a "fear", but I have a strong aversion to wearing someone else's shoes. I think it's disgusting.