I try to take it out with some relatively common stress-management techniques. Depending on how much importance I put on something, I can really be unhappy if I fail. From the front end, I try to reduce my expectations: if for instance I'm submitting a poem or piece of work to a magazine or journal for submission, I make sure that I know I've put in the most work I can do to make the piece "great." Then I remind myself that even if I think that's the case, others may not, so I try to understand I might end up getting rejected - or failing - and it doesn't have to have anything to do with the quality of the project I'm submitting. Maybe the journal is looking for other types of pieces, maybe I really am not advanced enough...but if you take away whatever "maybes" or "I should've..."s right from the start that helps.

Then I try to take my mind off of it! First and foremost for me is exercise. Especially if I am really stressed I'll go for a run or maybe lift some weights. I try to spend time relaxing and doing things I enjoy (Hubski, for one! watching TV shows) and removing myself from the source of the stress. If I've done everything I could have possibly done to succeed and I don't, I can't beat myself up over it. No one's perfect.

Finally I try to look at what failed, and why, and determine what I can learn from it. In some cases you will never know. It is very rare for anyone to tell me why they rejected a poem I submitted to a journal; they just don't have the time. So that's not a good example. But for instance if I get negative feedback about my job, I'll try to figure out what is causing me to act in such a way - what is causing the failure - and how I can improve to avoid it next time.