I appreciate that.

Things have been more difficult of late because my in-laws' lives have pushed things in an unpleasant direction. My mother-in-law definitely has some trauma in her past and her method for dealing with stuff is to repress it and pretend it didn't happen. My father-in-law has learned that you go along to get along.

So when my mother-in-law decided to tear into me for working on a motorcycle because it's a waste of time? I knew that wasn't about me.

And when she refused to stop even after I told her she was being offensive? I knew that was her inability to do anything other than repress it.

And when my father-in-law told my wife at breakfast it was because she's never really liked me and has an axe to grind? I knew that was him refusing to acknowledge that her coping strategies are failing, she's becoming increasingly isolated and that she's lashing out in the darkness.

And when I spent 45 minutes on the phone trying to say

"are you okay? I know this isn't about me, what's it about? Can we please try and work through this"

only to get

"you're not getting anything more than 'I'm sorry you feel bad' have some pretzels"

I knew that was her inability to cope more than anything else.

But it doesn't change the fact that I invited my in-laws over to dinner, got excoriated for doing something neither of them understand, was told it's because they've never liked me anyway and that I should move on...

...because they needed to have ice cream cake at my house two days later because it's my mother-in-law's birthday and then they're going to Ireland with the in-laws who don't disappoint them constantly.

So now I got nobody. Because fuckin' hell, whatever I got going on in my life from this point forth I'm sure as shit not letting them in on.