I am humbled by your compassion and fortitude. I am not religious, but the phrase "There but for the grace of God, go I." has been on my mind lately. Life can throw more than enough at us without a recession and pandemic to strip away resources and options. It makes me glad to see that you have managed to find constructive outlets for yourself. It's important that you hold onto that. We've missed you too. Take care of yourself, and good luck.
Thank you mk - I'm always happy to come back to this lovely place you've made. I am incredibly grateful that I am easily distractable by my many hobbies. Been learning trumpet the past few months - it's been really useful to have some clear benchmarks of "getting better through hard work and routine", and being able to reach a new part of the harmonic series every few weeks of practicing has been good for my mental health, in a weird way.