cooking and gardening has been a good way to keep my mind off things - i think i might try to restart Grubski again if i can remember to take more pictures of what i make than just the finished product of gardening there were two basil plants that were really overgrown when i moved into this apartment, and although the two original plants have been finally taken away by the former roommate that bought them i have three (3) cuttings that i'm rooting in water right now, so hopefully the legacy will begin again next thing i'm gonna try to get started growing - green onions i lost 10 pounds since i started fasting about a month ago and i feel proud - the only other time in my life i managed to lose weight was when i was on a rice-egg diet in japan for lack of cash and i feel like i'm getting more food and better food than that while keeping the same success the withdrawal side effects are waning and i think i've gotten out the other side successfully, so signs are good and i feel emotionally good right now - by that, "appropriately unhappy given everything going on" might be a better way to describe it, but that was already how it was when i was still on antidepressants so i guess it's fine i really want to send love out to everybody here - even if i'm not responding, i'm always reading and wishing the best for you guys, for however much that means