For probably 2 decades, I defined myself by my job. I had no identity outside of who I worked for, and what I did for them. (See: any job in silicon valley.)

Eventually, after having my heart broken by not getting a raise/promotion I expected, or getting fired, I realized that my employer cares exactly zilch about ME as a person.

That's when I flipped the script, and put myself first.

I now make more money than I ever have before. I work 8 hours a day, 40 hours a week. I set my own schedule. I have seniority, respect, and - when I started looking elsewhere for work - they gave me another significant raise to keep me here. I have a 15-minute commute. Everyone from the CEO down solicits my opinion/input on important subjects (we are a 400-person company). When I walk out the door in the afternoon, I have ZERO work on my mind. Nobody (except my direct boss) has my cell phone number.

We are driven to subsume our lives to our work. To be available for phone calls on the weekends. To check our emails at 10:PM. To work "just a couple extra hours" every week.

We think that if we say no, or do not make ourselves available in this way, that we will be fired or demoted or overlooked for promotions and raises.

In actuality, setting boundaries is HEALTHY FOR YOU, and good for your job. It earns you respect.

Have I worked all night? Sure! Absolutely! When I have CHOSEN to. I also wander off for 2-hour long lunches if I need a break, and maybe stay a little later in the evening to make up the time.

YOU ARE NOT YOUR JOB.

The University gig is your LIFE. The corporate gig is one in a long line of jobs that will allow you to ALSO have a life. Take vacations. Get promotions. Get head-hunted by other companies and given large hiring bonuses. Etc.

Choose wisely, grasshopper.