A few years back I saw a facebook post made by a friend during a week at school to promote Autism Awareness. I expected the usual high school support; simple statements that were not necessarily the most well thought out and might not entirely grasp the situation of people living with siblings who had autism, but well-meaning.
Instead, it was a post talking about how searching for "a cure for autism" is wrong; that people who are on the spectrum should be accepted as someone different and that its not something that should be thought of as a condition to be treated.
My youngest brother is on the spectrum; he's high-functioning autism, and has ADHD to boot (as do I, so I'm guessing the ADHD runs in the family.) Having a sibling with autism is very, very hard; they are difficult to predict, difficult to live with, and can sometimes have violent outbursts. They're almost always several years more immature than other children their age; my brother is getting towards 16 and he still makes funny voices in order to tell jokes.
If there was a cure then I believe everyone in our family, including my brother, would gladly take it, so long as it was safe and worked. But that's hypothetical, and beside the point; I doubt anyone here is going to say Autism should not be cured if it can at all be.
Here is the moral situation; its not necessarily a debate and think of it as a way to get a better look at yourself. Now then...
You and your partner have been wanting to have children; you've either impregnated your partner, been impregnated by your partner, or have paid for a surrogate mother for whatever reason. You are told at some point in the pregnancy that the child is guaranteed to have Autism; they gave a new test and its confirmed; there's an incredibly slight chance that the test may be flawed but its in the thousandths of a percent.
You and your partner have talked to the doctor and they said they could provide for an abortion; your health insurance will cover it and the process will be safe. If you're using the surrogate mother, you have spoken to her and she has said that she will totally abide by your decision. Your partner has also said that they will totally abide by your decision.
Will you keep the child, or will you abort? If you are against abortion, will you give it up for adoption? What if it was two months in to the pregnancy? Three? Four? Five?
I think the decision to abort based on a physical dysfunction falls on a spectrum. This is one of those that falls close to the line. For me, I would probably opt for an abortion, but I can understand why others would not. Miscarriages are common, and they are commonly the result of a developmental problem. As some mothers have difficulty carrying a healthy fetus to term, I can imagine that when it comes to a developmental issue, some mothers would have a miscarriage more readily than others. If you knew your child was going to be born with a condition that caused chronic intense pain, you'd have to be a disturbed individual to keep that child, IMHO. However, where the quality of life is debatable, I think the choice reasonably is.
Raising an autist would be an enormous burden, and if it is yet to be born it has not lived to miss life. I would probably opt for abortion; it is not that autism itself is something I have a problem with, but I would much rather not have to raise an autist. I don't want children anyway; a child with autism would be even more of a handful.
I may face exactly this choice in the near future. My fiancé is at an age where the risks of genetic complications in a pregnancy are going through the roof, -specifically regarding things like Downs Syndrome. That being said, I don't believe you can test for Autism, but if you could I would actually be on the fence. Downs Syndrome would see me choose to abort the pregnancy, but high functioning Autism...I don't know. It would be less clear for me. I think I would lean towards aborting simply because I would be extremely fearful of my ability to set up a situation where my child would be able to be provided for for the rest of his or her life after I was gone. The thought of not being able to button that up would kill me :/
There is an intense reddit comment from a mother who has an austic daughter and spills it all in the most intimate way. I think her daughter was older at the time of posting it too. Like 22 or something. I hope someone can find it because it is a really emotional and in depth look at those thoughts that you expect yourself to have living in a situation like that but you don't think people actually have. Some fucked up shit but very raw and real. And a good addition to this discussion.
I don't believe I ever caught that one; at this point my interaction with reddit is limited really to a few small subs that are dogshit. Although since I'm spending my evening drawing all over stuff with goggles I guess my standards might be different.
This is what I've found so far using google. The comment was probably from over a year ago or a pretty random post though. But these have me tearin up. http://vi.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/sl93q/get_out_the_...
The situation I'm in is not nearly as severe as those cases; my brother is still high functioning, but I still don't think I could do it. Personally I would abort the child; I know what living with someone who has autism is like. What I'm saying isn't nice, but its something that I would choose. Its hard; its one of the hardest things you can possibly do. There are different people in my house every day to work with my brother; we have to stay on a relatively tight budget even though my dad makes a very nice income, because my brother comes with costs of tens of thousands of dollars to keep him at years behind his peers. I love him, I really do, and he's high functioning enough that he will be able to hold down a job in a real work environment, but I couldn't do that to myself or anyone that I'm with. Its too much work, especially when looking at it from the point of few of a person who is still midway through college and has no plans of having kids for over a decade.
No, it was what popped up on google when I was searching. I didn't even notice that.
It's killing someone that is alive not sure it's murder though the way i see it is it would be the same as killing a seed that has started to shoot is that any different than killing a tree? I even go as far as to say if you have sex with someone that is a commitment to the creation of life and you should respect your choice as a result. if you are raped then is not a choice on the part of the man or woman who was raped. Ultimately though I think it is the choice of the woman if she wants a make a baby or not. It's a grey area the best thing is to set the morals that benefit society the most in the long run having more kids isn't a priority for the human race.
I think different societies have different moral norms. Some societies have left weak or handicapped children out to die in the woods to die, others have forced abortions while others deny contraception. It's nice to think that these practices could be regulated by logic but I think there are cultural forces that will overpower reasoned examination anytime soon. I do think that most of the custom has been shaped by nature or societies self interest.
It would take a lot of deliberation and would depend greatly on what the potential prognosis was. I can't give a definitive answer. We have a close family friend with a child that has downs. He is probably 13 years old now and seems to be doing really well. I'd say he has the intellect of a 5 year old and is sweet natured. He is going through puberty now which may severely change his disposition. But, I like seeing him at functions, he's always very happy and quick to smile/laugh. It took a village though, that's for sure. If you don't have the support or resources, then don't do it.