Yesterday I ran a 6:57 mile, the first time I've seen below seven minutes in at least fifteen years.

Within 30 feet of you is a world of amazing wonder that sits hidden just out of sight. There are so many wonders hidden in plain sight that you don't think about, yet you need them to live a modern life. Let's pull back the curtain just a little.

If you have an old house, you have a gas water heater. A gas water heater is basically a steel tank full of water, insulation to make the thing hold in heat, a pipe going in and a pipe going out, and a fire on the bottom to make the water warm. The gas comes from a pipe line that stretches hundreds if not thousands of miles, which could be its own post. But let's talk about that fire at the bottom of the tank. If you look at the controller box, there is a gas in, a pilot tube, a gas out, and some weird looking copper cable/tube. That weird tube is the focus of this conversation; this device is amazing and you need to know about it. The way a gas water heater works is there is a small flame called a pilot light that stays lit 24/7. When the temperature of the water in the tank gets too low, a signal is triggered that sends a full blast of gas into the area with the pilot light, which starts the heating fire. But, what if that pilot light goes out? If there is no pilot light, and the gas triggers, your house/basement/garage will now fill with natural gas, which is BAD. Enter that copper tube. Next to the pilot light is a round chunk of metal, called a thermocouple Thermocouples are amazing in their own right and could be a post on their own. When the pilot light is lit, the thermocouple gets hot and produces a small bit of voltage. This voltage then generates a very small bit of current. This current then charges and electromagnet that opens a valve to the main gas input line. THIS! This amazing simple and wonderful bit of human brain output is what keeps you house from blowing up when the pilot light goes out!!!!! If something happens and that thermocouple stops being heated, the electromagnet can't pull the gas valve open, and no gas enters the burning chamber until you have to relight the pilot flame. Why tell you this? Thermocouples go bad after about a decade or so and will need to be replaced. Or, if you are like me, you need to call the company and have a part sent to replace the whole control apparatus due to a recall that never made it my way. a few days of cold showers, a 45 minute phone call and 25 minutes with a screwdriver and wrench and I am back in business.

In other news, I ate something that did not agree with me. I was not sick, but I had a bad intestinal weekend. Stomache went to war against the brain who told everyone to go to hell while he banged on my skull and laughed at our pain. The biological nozzle effect is a real thing and all. The result of all this was a involuntary 80 hour fast. I started to manage to drink enough water to not dehydrate myself, and fortunately the water just went right through the system and did not seem to linger. But I'm better now. This was probably the longest I went without eating anything in 20ish years, definitely the longest I've been without food and the means to procure it. The fast seems to have reset my food cravings, and I have been eating smaller portions since recovery. In all a-round-ways feel better after the disaster.

The kicker? Over the 80 or so hours, I gained eight mother fucking pounds.

And I have forty god damned pounds of books to get rolling on.

This week feels like a week for headings.

—D&D—

So after sitting in on a few D&D sessions with my roommate's friends, and realizing that they're all dope people, I decided to join their campaign proper. I've created an Aasimar character that's a mix between Altaïr, Luke Skywalker in TLJ and Jesus because a masked rogue assassin with high dexterity and charisma seemed like a lot of fun to play. Together with the DM we found a cool way to tie my backstory up with the big enemy the party's been hunting down. It was challenging (but a TON of fun) to improv my character.

—Notes—

Thanks for all the feedback! I've ended up with a system where I write down advice, book notes, interesting thoughts and recommendations with labels in Google Keep. Each note gets a named source, whenever possible. Once a week I transfer those notes to a big Markdown file sorted chronologically. It takes less time than writing this, so it's not hard to keep up. One thing I've already noticed is that I write down a lot of quotes about time. I've also been reading Conspiracy by Ryan Holiday and made a lot of notes, both capturing the gist of the book as well as interesting thoughs and quotes. It's made me a more active reader, which is never a bad thing.

Speaking of notes: me and my housemate/best friend have been writing a small diary web-app together as a small side-project. The idea behind it is to simply write something every day. He did most of the webdev, I did the visuals. It's nothing big and probably not permanent, so be warned, but you can check it out here. If only for the fancy animation

—Swimming—

I think I have figured out my upper body movement and breathing pattern. My leg kick, however, is still ultra-useless: if I only use my legs, I would not be surprised to be overtaken by a snail. The swimming instructor got me to try on flippers, which was a whole 'nuther thing. I can do that on my back, but it is somehow much more difficult when I'm face down in the water. He recommended me training fins, which are basically very very short flippers, and they seem to improve my kick somewhat but it is definitely a work in progress.

—Paper—

I finally got around to finishing the first rough draft of my paper! The four professors that helped me with my thesis, as well as the professor that inspired me for that, all want to help me write a paper. The move, new job and new life made it a bit harder than expected to find stretches of uninterrupted time. I think my draft sucks, but most of my writing sucks for a long time until it doesn't so I guess I just need to grind this more.

—That one app—

First off, thanks for the advice y'all. I've had a surprising amount of matches this week. Most of which resulted in ghosting from me or her, but that's just how that works. But I had a date this Sunday, and she's cute and smart and there's a second date coming so that's neat. And if that doesn't work out...well, there are avenues to explore. We'll see. :)

Sooo... Last week ended really nicely. Did less shit on my exam than expected, and my time with said lady friend from last week took an unexpected turn for the better. And, to top it all off, I just hung up on a solid phone interview.

Someone pinch me.

It's been one full week of daily travel vlogs for me! Currently in Kiev, going to Odessa next followed by Lviv, Warsaw and Berlin. It's a bit exhausting, but i'm loving it right now.

I grew up with a lot of weird tools. We had centerpunches that nobody else had. We had a piece of railroad track for an anvil. We had some strange and wonderful punches and cutters and saws and metalworking hammers that have no business working on cars.

Over the past three weeks I've learned that every.single.tool is for making jewelry.

My father made his and my mother's rings by melting down a bunch of pre-war dimes and then casting them in a coffee can. He made wax molds, put them in investment in a coffee can, melted the silver and slung it around and around his head on a chain. This story has been much repeated by my mother, or it was when they were still married. What was not pointed out - what was not discussed - was whether he ever made any other jewelry. It was obvious to me that the answer was "not."

The past three weeks, every Tuesday and Thursday, has been like goddamn Karate Kid.

I know these tools. I lived with these tools. And they were invisible. And they were unused. They were much loved - you had to treat them with respect but why was never clear. My father has never made jewelry in my lifetime. But he kept buying jeweler's tools up to last year. He has three grandkids.

On the one hand I'm absolutely gutted about this. What does it say? On the other hand I'm incredibly angry about this. What kind of pussy doesn't fucking follow his dreams for fifty goddamn years? It occurred to me last week that I'm where I am, and my father is not, because my wife is vastly more supportive than his was. My wife, however, pointed out that my father has been divorced for more than ten years and still persists in covering every available yard in dead cars.

It occurred to me just now that my mother was always incredibly supportive of his jewelry-making. The ring story was one she told multiple times a year. Whereas the dead cars were a source of constant friction. During high school she'd get drunk and take all the keys and move everything that started into someone else's driveway, or up a dirt road, or wtf ever (and we sat there passively because this is what codependency looks like). We'd spend hours finding the fucking things - ever spent an early Saturday morning looking for a '76 Buick Skylark up someone else's driveway? And now he's coming to the conclusion that he waited too long to retire because he doesn't have the energy to fix and restore nine dead and worthless cars.

I would not have thought learning to silver-solder would be so soul-searching. Of course, I know how to silver-solder. When you learn how to weld 30-gage steel with baling wire and an oxyacetylene torch silver solder is the easiest fucking thing.

I bought a Kennedy tool box. They're expensive. They're for my machine tools. I probably bought a Kennedy tool box because my father has a Kennedy tool box for his machine tools. I did not know it was a Kennedy tool box until we started talking about tool boxes, and I did not know how much I knew about machining until I was surrounded by aspiring machinists. Or rather, I had forgotten. Twenty years ago, because my instructors at UW sucked, they let me teach the rest of my 300-level manufacturing class how to operate lathes and mills, and teach them how to weld. This is because thirty years ago my father taught me how to operate lathes and mills and taught me how to weld. At home we had an American LaBlonde lathe with a placard on it that said "Restored by the Army Corps of Engineers 1918" on it. At UW we had a bunch of identical American LaBlond lathes that had been rode hard, put away wet by 60 years of engineering students. You were lucky to get 25 thousandths out of them. In the corner, though, was a bigger, burlier LaBlond that nobody was allowed to touch. It was spoken about in hallowed tones. It was said you could get micron-level precision with it, although not even the instructors turned it on for demonstrations.

It was waiting for me when I arrived at my new school. It still has the UW property sticker on it. It requires instructor permission to use, and is still spoken about in hallowed tones. They named it "Baby."

I knew going back to school would be melancholy. I knew it would be nostalgic - the first time I smelled a machine shop in 20 years was a somatic bodyblow.

I did not know I'd feel like goddamn Aragorn of Gondor.

I had the best dream last night. I was at a multi-state state fair. So was Orlando Bloom, and while Orlando was in the middle of winning some very weird aerial ropes-artist competition, he swung down onto the ground for a second and told me he thought I was cute. Then I ran into some nice middle-aged ladies and gents and we had a conversation about the difference in archaic cocktails, specifically syllabubs and flips.

Yes, those words came up in my dream. No, I have not recently watched any of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise.

It was the kind of dream that is so good you try to fall asleep again when you wake up from it, just in case you can slip back in. Spoiler: this morning I couldn't manage that trick.

Alas, Orlando. Next time.

Last call for players in Hubski Game III of Diplomacy. Two slots remain open and the game starts tomorrow night.

https://webdiplomacy.net/board.php?gameID=220603

Join code: hubski

My favorite part is when mk accidentally sends private dispatches to the public channel.

It's weewoo, sorry I've been mostly lurking. I'd like a belgium white. Things have been well on my end. Got hired on as the full time designer for the thing I was interning for, and moving to St Louis in late May. Fuck yeah.

I deactivated my other account because someone found my hubski account- and the things I wrote at a low point aren't exactly the best things for people to read through.

I also felt like I didn't really use hubski in a very healthy way. I like to use websites as public journals because of my desire for social approval and how boring it feels to write something that will never be seen by anyone else. I'm working on this.

Something I was never able to figure out was my problem of social anxiety- there were so many times that I wanted to reply to someone's reply to me on hubski but I couldn't figure out what to write, so they were left ignored. Sorry if I kept you waiting, or if I come off as aloof, or I don't know.

Another thing I do- I write my replies to comments and facebook messages and emails and everything in Notepad. I hate that all chat apps show when other people are typing. Wtf, why.

There's this song I've been obsessed about lately. You Fucken Sucker by Paul de Jong, of The Books. It has a transposition of Mary Had A Little Lamb onto a wistful tune, with the nusery rhyme alternating with a cursing fit. It feels like having nostalgic thoughts with pangs of regret.

Saturday will be one the one year anniversary of buying a house. (Wow.) I have to look for a roommate posthaste. Current one has to move and I'm not looking forward to rolling the dice with a replacement. I want someone who shares my values and sleep schedule, is responsible and financially stable, and can move in June 1st. That seems to be asking a lot. Put up something on Craigslist.

Last weekend was Nationals for the National Association of Intercollegiate Gymnastics Clubs, and it was a blast. I placed 9th in my (middle-tier) division for high bar :p . Seeing all the gymnasts was so inspiring. Under my instagram bio (when viewed on a phone) you'll see a Story icon named Nationals. Check it out for some of the jaw dropping stunts I saw. In trying to emulate, I've been inspired to try a roundoff double flip. If someone told me 6 months ago I'd be doing this, I would NOT have believed you. There is much that can be said about incremental improvement, about showing up to the gym and punching the clock.

Brief health update - Still trying to get back to the office, failed 4/4 days this week so far. Going to try again tomorrow. The part that yields the most frustration isn't actually being bed-bound for the first 1/4 of my conscious day. It's the fact that at least half of the physicians I talk to want to pin the majority of my symptoms on anxiety. I have anxiety. According to my counselor and the psych-D who prescribes my nerve pain med and who would be the managing physician for any psychotropic meds I would take, it is well controlled and NOT the cause of my chest issues. It contributes, it makes things more difficult, but it's not causative. In fact, it seems to be that I'm only anxious when I am experiencing symptoms such that I can't function. Yes, Dr. So-and-so, I am aware that my symptoms are not presenting typically. The walls of my heart are four times thicker than they should be and so filled with scar tissue that several of the imaging/assessment tools we use are basically useless on me. Yes, I am aware that I am not going to be getting a heart transplant any time soon. What this whole mess amounts to at the moment is playing around with medication dosage and timing and hoping it helps.

Music - Tonight is the first rehearsal for the Verdi Requiem with the Ann Arbor Symphony. The show is Saturday night. This music is old hat for many members of the choir but it’s my first time performing the piece in its entirety and I’m looking forward to it quite a bit. I am a bit nervous about doing the whole 90 minutes standing truthfully, but people have sat down for sections of shows before, and we have a longstanding rule in this chorus that it is better to sit down than fall down. I worry more that I will have too much pride to recognize when I need to take a seat I suppose.

I’ve also been playing my guitar a bit more than I have recently. Working on an acoustic cover of Gooey by Glass Animals that is coming together pretty well. I think I still need some more work with a metronome before I record anything again though. My tone is great but my tempi need work. I have this musical theater flair for the dramatic that leads to an inconsistent tempo when I ‘feel’ it a bit too much.

Grubski - The pork buns turned out well. My dad brought me back some mangrove snapper fillets from Florida so I marinated them in fresh orange juice and pepper and baked them (TFW no grill in sight) and they turned out pretty awesome aside from all the little bones.

I'm sitting in a meeting for my kids' school... they did a parent survey. They only got 160 responses out of 350 families...

To me that seems like a REALLY HEALTHY sample... and I'm no statistician - but I think 45% is pretty damn skippy good.... and might even be called "statistically significant" sample.

The High School science teacher in the room flat out disagreed with me and told me I wasn't being mindful of the families that didn't respond and that I was trying to silence them. He then likened our survey to the US census and tried to make it sound like we're trying to oppress some families....

Maybe my basic statistical sense is off... but a 45% response rate is PRETTY DAMN GOOD... and science man can f$%& off back to the hippie hole he crawled out of.

Local Politics

We've got a ballot proposition coming up. It's a combo tax raise to fund mental health resources AND build a new jail. You'd think that those would be on separate propositions, but nope.

Part of the county's argument has been that they'll be forced to expand the jail anyways if the prop fails. Surprise, surprise, turns out that was bullshit When pressed to cite why they'd have to expand, they came up blank.

Lovely.

Socialist Clubbe

Also on local politics, I've offered twice now to help the local fledgling DSA chapter research upcoming local elections. They asked for help, I offered. Thus far, no reply. This could absolutely just be on a community wiki, but no, I've got to get ahold of chairpeoples X,Y, or Z so I can get access to the google docs.

I'm really starting to dislike leadership structures.

Boneheaded Shit My Union Local Has Done

As a part of automating, a bunch of bid position workers got shifted around. Company plopped 'em down where ever management felt like, instead of going by seniority preference. One of the affected people put in a grievance about it. Union waited two months, and then dropped the grievance at panel. The person who put in the grievance was told the union thought they would lose, and didn't want to set a bad precedent.

Practice is precedent, ya dumbfucks.

I'm really starting to dislike leadership structures.

Running a half marathon on an island this weekend, and boarding a flight eight hours after that. Going to Arches and Canyonlands and next week. Going to leave my phone off and enjoy some quality time with my partner, and think about life and what all this is about.

Holy shit tax bill.

All else is well. Making mice live longer. Teaching my daughter army songs and how to tie her shoes.

I typed up a whole rant and then accidentally closed out of my browser so now I'm salty. Here we go.

Some back story: my maternal family is quite large, and composed of all walks of life. Healthcare and related fields are prominent in the family though - I have family that are doctors, nurses, pharmacists, researchers, etc. Okay.

My sister posted an article about recent measles outbreaks in the KC area. We happen to have a cousin who is vehemently anti-vaccination. Her kids are great, but her youngest is low-functioning autistic, which I assume is the source of her extremism.

Much of the family expresses distress at the measles outbreak. Anti-vax cousin mentions "measles isn't deadly." That's pretty much where it begins. Many give her various reputable sources of information that measles is not only absolutely deadly, but easily avoidable with vaccines that are fucking effective and fucking safe.

End result - she cuts off her family that is apparently not supporting her and her struggle with her autistic child. I want to point out that she has referred to all of her kids as "damaged." I hope to whatever higher power that those kids don't ever find any of her various posts, because this wasn't the first time.

This isn't the first time I've had a relationship cut off for something stupid. It's tough the first time, but ultimately, it's a two way street. And in this case, as long as she keeps her plague-ridden children away from my elderly grandmother and my organ-transplant uncle, I don't honestly think I give a shit.

Like I said, her kids are good kids, and I don't blame them at all for any of this. I hope that someday they come of age and right their wrongs. I was talking to my mother about this, and apparently my anti-vax cousin had already cut off the entirety of her husband's family for opposing her "opinion" about vaccinations.

Ugh. I can't say I'm too upset about the end result of the whole thing. It was a long time coming.