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comment by tacocat
tacocat  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What happened to ThatFanficGuy?

After reading that and as a person who unintentionally came across as a dick to Kleinbl00 specifically, I didn't get all pissy. I took note that I can seem to, and actually very much do depending on the situation, lack some basic interpersonal skills. So I apologized and admitted that. Like that's kinda an understatement (my weirdness). But that makes me the problem. The world does not need to conform to my idiosyncrasies. I need to learn to exist in the world better.





johnnyFive  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  

That's true enough, but also goes both ways: he doesn't get to dictate what's an acceptable way to communicate on hubski or anywhere else.

user-inactivated  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    he doesn't get to dictate what's an acceptable way to communicate on hubski

Sure he does. We all do.

The filter/mute/hush/block settings are available to everyone.

If TFG had only been ticked off with KB, he could easily have blocked him. But he deleted his account. Which makes me think he was ticked off with more than just KB.

cgod  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  
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tacocat  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I never cared for him but it's awesome that there's a website where you kinda get to know people as people instead of stupid clever names. Learn personalities and such. I spent less time interacting with Facebook friends than you guys

rthomas6  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Well, I'm not a very active user, but I liked his comments. He's stuck in his own head a lot, and I often go through the same thing. I liked his questions, because he always seemed to be trying to improve, to be seeking more insight and growth.

OftenBen  ·  2666 days ago  ·  link  ·  

As someone who also has spent a lot of time 'stuck in his own head' I think my two cents is warranted.

I've definitely had my low points, and shared quite a few of them. I even had the bad sense/taste to be argumentative when people were trying to help.

I'm thankful for the patience of this group. I think that of all of the places for a person with depressive tendencies to wind up, this is a fairly welcoming space. Welcoming in the sense that no one begrudges you for the occasional overly negative post. That said, if I had been continuously combative I doubt I would have continued to find support.

I like to think that this place encourages growth. I am a vastly different person today than the person who wrote

and I am thankful for hubksi's part in helping me get past that point in my life.

The question isn't the motivation though. It's the methods by which these things are discussed. If I want to have that kind of conversation I need to start somewhere other than 'All optimistic people are stupid, fite me.' I need a more nuanced thought process and a mind that is open to be proven wrong, or at least some flexibility in my thinking if it's to be a productive and personable conversation.

We don't have to agree on anything except the mores by which we communicate. Those are essential.

cgod  ·  2666 days ago  ·  link  ·  
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elizabeth  ·  2666 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I think this conversation is unproductive.

It feels like taking behind the guys back.

Sure, he had his quirks - but who doesn't? This diversity of experiences is why I like hubski. And his linguistic post s were super informative and plain amazing.

And to re-iterate what was said - you can always fileter folks. You don't have to read anyone's diary if thats what they feel like posting. I read a lot and didn't reply to a bunch (for lack of productive commentary) . Cause I still cared. But you can just filter and forget - that's the beauty of the 'ski

cgod  ·  2666 days ago  ·  link  ·  

You are right and I suppose I'm feeling ungenerous tonight TFG became a significant member I Hubski because he was so active. I sometimes appreciated that activity and I sometimes found it difficult.

I feel like I tried to tell him a few important things about being happier and he shrugged off every single one. He wasn't happy and more than half of his solutions were diet, exercise and keeping a more ridged schedule.

I found it frustrating.

I hope he is doing better. I'm sure he looks at Hubski still, I don't think I could talk behind his back.

Some times some things on Hubski are far from beautiful. I've feel like I'm in a Hubski funk. I've seen a few pieces of content that I've really found distasteful and I'm probably a surly bastard right now due to other things in life.

steve  ·  2666 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    I'm probably a surly bastard right now

When aren't you a surly bastard? (you know I'm kidding)

    due to other things in life.

I hope they resolve themselves sooner than later.

OftenBen  ·  2666 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    I think this conversation is unproductive.

Sort of necessary though, would you agree? If we want the community to develop, we need to be able to examine why people join, why they leave, what can be learned?

I get the icky-feeling. It might be necessary though for the good of the group.

elizabeth  ·  2666 days ago  ·  link  ·  

For sure - I meant the part where people were saying they disliked some of his posts. I felt that was beside the point of why he left.

tacocat  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  

#teamkleinbl00

nowaypablo  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  

well that doesn't really help the situation

tacocat  ·  2664 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I was joking.

#teamjacob

nowaypablo  ·  2667 days ago  ·  link  ·  
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