Those Korg videos. Those came out post 90s? It does the kind of thing I want, but probably a little too much menu diving for my tastes. I think what I want is a bit more bare bones even: like the sequencer built into the volca, except like 3 of them stacked together, with some more buttons. Even the arp on the volca would be fine with a couple more functionalities and a few more buttons rather than all the settings jammed in 10 positions on a 1 cm diameter knob.
Honestly? 1) Stack sequencers 2) Buy some Doepfer 3) Learn Reaktor or Bidule, which is hardly stepping out-of-the-box. The problem is MIDI is a digital protocol which means the chipbenders don't fuck with it much, but what you're looking for is pretty advanced analog behavior which means you either need to be a diehard chipbender or you need to do it in the box. In the box is so much easier.