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There are so many variables. For my friend and I, it took about five years to be what is consider "good" friends. But we have the advantage of both knowing, clearly and unambiguously, that what we had before will not happen again. I think that helps. How things ended wasn't any real betrayal, either. There were hurt feelings, but it wasn't awful. Change any of those variables and it'll change that timing or the willingness to even want to talk. I think I'm the only one of her exes she still talks to.