Hey man, at least with them paying for your apartment you don't have to live with them. I had a restraining order against my mother for a decade. My dad never tried to get me insurance, or medical help. My mom now feels guilty, and fights to get me the help I need, even when I don't think I deserve it. Have you read the Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Walker? If you want to feel independence take some time off to go WWOOFing. It takes time to heal the weirdness of being an adult, that is still treated like a child. Only 40 years ago in the US, people used to get married, and get jobs at 16.
I'm not familiar with the restraining orders system. Does it mean that she wasn't allowed to see you? If so... I'm hesitant to ask, but - why? What kind of help? Why does she feel guilty now? No, I haven't. I just checked it on Amazon and added it to my wish list, so maybe I'll get it someday. It sounds like something I must read. That's a great idea. I thought about it before, and now that you've mentioned it... It sounds like something I'd love to do. The notion of hard work for sustainance sounds appealing - it is as if you're working towards the food, directly, instead of the detached way many of us consume it today. Thank you for your advice. I appreaciate it.I had a restraining order against my mother for a decade.
My mom now feels guilty, and fights to get me the help I need
Have you read the Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Walker?
If you want to feel independence take some time off to go WWOOFing.
She was pretty controlling, punished me for her getting in trouble in high school. I was mouthy, and I also thought I was smarter than her. I was able to run away, and show someone after she beat me up. If she bothered me, a restraining order means she automatically gets arrested. I was showing early signs of my illness, so it wasn't just me being an unreasonable jerk. I was medically less than reasonable at the time. Right now she helped get me a scholarship for people who are too disabled to do unskilled labor, but are too smart to get disability. WWOOFing is really fun, I wouldn't recommend college to anyone who thought of it as less than a privilege.
It would probably be cheaper for your parents to pay for the cost of getting from farm to farm, than to pay for rent. You would still have to maintain a relationship with them, and WWOOFing would not help advance your other life goals. You might just take the pretty decent hand you have been dealt, and go to school. You will really love living alone. If you don't want them to pay your rent, get a job, and tell them "no thanks". Don't burn your bridges, and try to make yourself homeless out of idealism. If you feel bad, go volunteer. Take the summers off and go WWOOFing, because you really can't beat anything about the lifestyle. The food is always amazing, the other people are at the very least interesting. The work is literally the funnest activity, I can imagine, but I am weird.
I think you're right. Doing crazy shit won't do me any good right now, I would imagine. My parents won't understand WWOOFing and anything of that sort - it's not just foreign but alien to them - but they understand higher education; in their own way, but still. That, too, you got right, and I better keep it in mind while I'm studying. It's a great opportunity to learn deep and interesting stuff. Gotta remember that.You might just take the pretty decent hand you have been dealt, and go to school. You will really love living alone. If you don't want them to pay your rent, get a job, and tell them "no thanks". Don't burn your bridges, and try to make yourself homeless out of idealism.
I wouldn't recommend college to anyone who thought of it as less than a privilege.