You're right. The thing is that I'm terrified of success, because reaching it might mean that I might fail, and that'd be hurtful, so I often convince myself to do something that can't possibly hurt me instead... like eating a lot of sweets or sitting my ass off in front of the screen. Human mind is an amazing thing, but sometimes it lays path to Hell with its good intentions. But laying it off on my mind is shifting responsibilities. I'm the person responsible for how I perform; whether I succeed in an achievement that's more than internal is not entirely up to me, but what I can - and must - do is do my best. I am interested, and I must also remind myself of that, and of that it's better to fail at achieving goals than to not try. Thank you for reminding me of that.