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You really hit your stride after the first few paragraphs. I would recommend reading the first part again, maybe out loud, to edit for clarity. The world is solid and I loved the idea of a nobel magical city falling to the worst traits of human nature. More on that mundane moral decay might be interesting. It's a good story and it was interesting to the end. Well done.
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amouseinmyhouse · 3419 days ago · link ·
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