I think you nailed it. It's the hyperbole. The inability for people to even try and see the other side of a discussion. You know the core thing I think that really breaks reddit, and it's not obvious, but good comments get squelched all the time by being downvoted, because they are unpopular opinions. Not that they are not well thought out or not well argued, but simply because a bunch of people see it, downvote it and it ends up being buried. It kind of discourages people from posting dissenting opinions and having a real discussion, because whats the point of posting something you know will probably get downvoted into oblivion? Come of think of it, I've sat in front of my computer, and spent an hour composing a long, (what I think was, haha) thoughtful and well-written reply, only to just close the tab in disgust because I know that my opinion wouldn't well received and I'd have 30 comments of people telling me to go fuck myself, and find my comment buried and hidden. The whole upvote/downvote system polarizes the discussions, bit by bit, which polarizes the community. Add that to a management that isn't transparent at all and you end up with a site that has effectively bred into it's community it's own problems. Ew.
I would always do the same thing, too. I'd have this giant, well written piece explaining my point, and I'd just go "What's the point?" and delete it. I know two people are going to read it, it's just going to sit at 1 and be buried under a bunch of half-assed puns and stale jokes that are going to be gilded, voted to the top, and be regarded as the "best comment on Reddit, ever!" If it goes against the grain, I just don't even hit the reply button. I know it's just going to get brigaded by a bunch of red pillers or gamer gators that are going to call me an SJW-lizard shill, even if I actually have support. Seriously, I had someone call me an Anita Sarkeesian shill when I pointed out that some paper wasn't being used by schools, after a bunch of people said that this optional assignment on a website - unrelated to Common Core, said that Common Core was being used to teach kids that video games are bad. I was just like "Really?" I mean, I made some snarky remarks about Reddit's inability to actually read or research something, but it got people really upset for some reason. It feels like a few years ago, before the admin changes, before Gamer Gate, Reddit was a pretty nice place to be. There were still politicized discussions and lame jokes, but there was still a lot of good discussion. Now, it seems like the only cream that comes to the top is just another post about how either the admins or women are ruining the world. It's just sad.