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comment by user-inactivated
user-inactivated  ·  3489 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: May 6, 2015

Last final tomorrow, probably won't be on hubski for a while after that because I'll be away from my computer and probably in a coma

It Follows fucked me up, what a scary-ass movie.

Oh yeah how do you guys deal with the crippling anxiety that comes from feeling like you're not succeeding as much as your peers whether it's true or not





_refugee_  ·  3488 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    Oh yeah how do you guys deal with the crippling anxiety that comes from feeling like you're not succeeding as much as your peers whether it's true or not

Sigh, don't fucking ask me, you're going to pry this bio of Edna St. Vincent Millay out of my cold desperate dead hands when I realize, "why trying to be good when so other people have been more good faster than i ever have been or probably ever will be"

- is there a hidden answer here

coffeesp00ns  ·  3489 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    Oh yeah how do you guys deal with the crippling anxiety that comes from feeling like you're not succeeding as much as your peers whether it's true or not

Don't compare yourself to your peers. compare yourself to high level professionals in your field. That way at least the shitty voice in your head has a point.

That's the best advice I got, and it's bad.

user-inactivated  ·  3489 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Since it is unrealistic to ask you not to compare yourself to anything, it's what we do, etc, try using an endogenous objective benchmark. Define the concept of "success" and do what you can to reach it. Meanwhile, your peers can try to reach their own defined success points that have nothing to do with yours. I think the world would be a better place if everyone did this, but it's by no means easy.

insomniasexx  ·  3489 days ago  ·  link  ·  

You can't compare yourself to people beneath you or you will never grow. But you can't obsess about not being the people above you because you can never be them. Instead figure out what about the person you like and aspire to be and then figure out how to get there.

kingmudsy  ·  3489 days ago  ·  link  ·  

First, you should try to compare yourself less to your peers. Everyone has a different path in life, and you might be selling yourself short. Some related reading for you!

Second, since I find myself struggling with the same thing; I try to find something to engross myself in that's unique from my peers, since it can give me a sense of accomplishment by allowing myself to look forward to my own goals, rather than sideways at what others are doing. I dabble in a lot of things, but am usually not an expert at many things I've done--I posted in this thread about building an R/C Quadcopter with a friend, which will be a cool project, but I've also learned the basics of knitting and rock climbing over the years just because of personal interest. I'm not particularly good at either of these things, but it was still cool to learn!

You probably already do this, though. I know you run a gaming blog and have done LP's with your sister, and I think that's awesome, but the bottom line is that you need to start counting your worth in terms of what you can do, not what you can't. (Idk if I'm being too presumptuous with this advice, sorry if I come off that way!)