It is okay. I have done well with this post by reading quotes as you and material as quotes. Because two people can look at information and view it in different ways. This is because, going back to a previous statement, this question is not a scientific question. There is no "correct answer," and there is no way to be correct. It is only a matter of opinion. People can have different opinions even on important things. That is okay. I do not understand your "final endpoint". What does "science does not give me a reason to live" refer to?And why would I hold an opinion different than you if we were both equally informed and equally correct?
My concern with religion is one of truth. Is there a deity, is there a spirit, is there metaphysics. To that question, there is only one answer. I do understand that you can look at things from the viewpoint that objective reality is not all there is, and that there can be something beyond that we cannot see, that we cannot detect, etc, and you feel it is there, you feel it is real. However, I view that as wrong, just as you probably view the fact that I do not see or believe in anything beyond the physical as wrong.