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comment by beezneez
beezneez  ·  3746 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What has moving to a new place done for you?

Strange that we have much in common with regards to Viet Nam.

    Turns out that lots of places want to hire me for professions I've left behind because I didn't feel like they would take me places, but that is turning out not to be true.

I hope that works out for you. Assuming you were teaching English in Vietnam... if you get to know the ex-pat community, I mean the old, old ones, you start to tap into an angry-at-life perspective. There's a better life to be had. You also meet some wonderful, lasting connections. What kind of professions?

Story time.

A man known as Sandy is in his mid-70's. He had been in Vietnam since the end of the war. The reason that he found himself there is that he crashed a car in Australia without insurance, and he decided to flee the country. To my knowledge, he's never gone back to Australia. To this day, the strangest thing I've heard is fluent Vietnamese being screened through an Australian accent. I met him at a pizza place, the only pizza place in the city, as he was a daily regular. He would sit down, read a book, and have a couple beers. His being married to a Vietnamese woman allowed him, presumably, to buy some land and perhaps a few businesses. I learned something important from this man.

    Boston, a city that I love and am glad to be moving back to, especially because I still have a network of friends there.

This is of key importance. I moved to Denver with nothing but 2 grand and a car. I have no family here (except a great uncle in Loveland), and no real reason to stay. To make up for that great lack, I've done essentially what Sandy did - find a central place to be a regular at, meet people, and generally depend on new networking to provide a livable lifestyle. When I first got here, I knew if I got evicted or something went wrong I'd be either out on the streets or driving back to Oregon. It doesn't matter where you are; a network of people that recognize you is absolutely priceless.





humanodon  ·  3746 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Throw out an EFL teaching acronym or initialism and I've taught it extensively. I hear you about the "angry at life" thing that plagues the ex-pat community there. A friend of mine started going through a nervous breakdown while he was there, which coincided with the birth of his second kid and the loss of his job as AAC at one of the larger English schools in our city. He started self-medicating and seeing a doctor who was able to see that everything he was going through was all in his head. Now, my friend married a really great Viet woman and was living a pretty great life, but when the doctor told him she'd seen what he was going through time and time again in other ex-pats he was shocked to hear that her diagnosis was "loneliness".

Now, they live in England and he at least, is much happier for it. I don't know about you, but I just couldn't stick it out there. I can't make a life for myself in a place that will deny that my building a life there still means that I'm a foreigner. Of course, there is some of that in America too but having grown up in it, I can handle it. So, I absolutely agree that a network of some kind is so essential to making a life in a new place.