When I read I thought, "Yes, and here you are now doing the same thing." I don't think I found the narrator to be very sympathetic. I am not trying to say in any way that she brought her problems upon herself or deserved them; not at all. I am saying that this is an article written by someone who temporarily experienced poverty that was completely out-of-the-norm with her day-to-day life and then, after a few years, was able to leave her temporary financial abode of "poverty" and then wrote about it (which is a reasonable thing for her to do). I would be more sympathetic if this was a story about people who cannot so easily escape poverty and how they deserve respect/lack of judgment/sympathy, highlighted and/or expanded by the author's own experiences, as opposed to what it is currently. I did feel she was complaining a bit much, as I also felt when she complained about the guy who gave her the Jesus card. On the other hand, a close friend very recently told me, essentially, that I am not a very sympathetic person, and my reaction was pretty much "Yeah, that's fair," so that's coming in through here too of course.That’s the funny thing about being poor. Everyone has an opinion on it, and everyone feels entitled to share.
These people are extremely annoying, belittling, and condescending. Throughout this same time period, my mom worked in a small local diner. I don't know how many people know this, but waitresses don't make minimum wage, they make about $3-4 an hour here in Illinois. We LIVED on tips. So when those people, excuse me, those pricks, leave those cards, it does nothing but take food out of our mouthes, and it made us bitter and sad. I didn't get the vibe that she complained too much. As someone who lived a situation of going from middle-class to dirt poor almost overnight during that time period, who's family is just barely crawling out of that hole (I've left for college, up to my eyeballs in debt and still not able to afford it, my mom has just managed to buy a house after working 12 hour days at a factory and going to school at the same time), I'd rather the story be out there at all. This was an interested read, I liked it.I did feel she was complaining a bit much, as I also felt when she complained about the guy who gave her the Jesus card. On the other hand, a close friend very recently told me, essentially, that I am not a very sympathetic person, and my reaction was pretty much "Yeah, that's fair," so that's coming in through here too of course.
I assume we're talking about the Jesus guys and not friends that say you're not sympathetic here. Yes, in Delaware and PA actually the minimum waitperson page is $2.73. Laws are usually in place so that if you don't earn actual minimum wage with tips, the employer must pay the difference, however I imagine that is a difficult thing to pursue (much like food stamps). I can understand that not being tipped makes a person bitter and sad as a result. Another phenomenon I've witnessed that arises out of a lack of tips from perceived groups of people can be a rise in generalizations and stereotypes made about those people (for example, "black people don't tip") which I think unfortunately leads to cycles of negative feedback and behavior. One should tip, and if one cannot, one should not eat out - that is the opinion I hear from my waitperson relatives and friends. I think the article is fairly well-written and could be a lot worse in terms of "woe is me." I agree. I'm glad to hear your family is doing more successfully although of course sounds like there is still a lot in front of you.
EVERYONE should be mandated to work in a service/tipping industry when they're young or they should have to forego the privilege of dining out. It's hard work and often for little to no pay. The $2-$3 an hour wage is pretty standard in the US. Without tips, you get screwed unless you are "in training" in which case restaurants pay minimum wage.