Mainly we all learned that I am not, in fact, a man of principle. Seriously, though, I'm glad that I held the stance I did all through my 20s. I've had no fewer than three women who would have married me in a heartbeat, had I asked. Were I inclined in that direction, I think I would have made a premature--and certainly sub-optimal--choice, and I may have regretted it for a long time. Now I have the girl I've always wanted, so I can handle quite a bit of ribbing from friends and family. It's worth it.
Congrats on almost being married, that's pretty rad! Though it does mean yr getting old. My definition of old pretty much consists of marriage and/or friends getting married though.
You can be married and still not believe in marriage. I am. and regarding the ring discussion on this thread: I was more than happy to take my [current] husband's first wedding ring and get some words engraved inside it that originated in another relationship. The words were "endless love" -- although I considered "War is easy; love is hard." -- and regarding your sub-optimal choices . . . honour them. All my sub-optimal choices taught me how to be a human being and survive in the world. My needs for sub-optimal love continue though. (tee hee)
Also the edit box is not working, so consider this my edit. It should read as follows: "Edit: Congratulations! I assume these are the big life changes you had mentioned. Did you buy into De Beers (I'm sure kleinbl00 has already broken the ice on this little scam to you?)? I have always joked that if I were to get engaged only a blood diamond would do. It's not real unless small children have bled over it. (IT IS A JOKE.) Also, I assume we are all invited."
Okay so here's what I plan to do. Maybe it's not as appealing to you as to me, but I'm going to actually make the ring for arguewithatree. There are tons and tons of really, really fascinating minerals and stones you can make a ring out of that are far more beautiful than diamonds are already, and it carries way more meaning when you create it yourself obviously. I mean, yeah, it would take time and some tools that you may have to acquire that you didn't even know about before, but isn't that precisely what marriage is about?
My mother fell in love with a symbol on a truck mudflap in Peru. She drew it in her journal. My dad carved it out of wax and melted a bunch of old dimes down, then used clay for the investment. He made two - one for her, one for him. They're pretty cool. Me? I got my wife an Alexandrite from the russian Mafiya; she had a mokume game one made for me out of iron and gold. When people ask me where I got it I tell them I mugged a couple hobbits on their way to Mordor.
If you have the skills to pull it off, I think it's a fantastic idea. I've done a little bit of metal work in the past, but I don't have access to a kiln, centrifuge or a buffing wheel right now, so it would be a bit impractical. Also, I can bezel set a stone alright, but I've never tried to prong set a stone. I don't particularly care for bezels, so that idea is unappealing to me. Although I know they sell precast prong settings, so maybe it's not too difficult. Anyway, I wish you luck. It sounds like a really cool project.