When I was talking about the imaginary man in the sky, I was mentioning that I do the things only for me and not because god is watching my deeds. Im not against god in any way though. I wouldnt say being atheistic is bad but I feel that having god can help and give strength to my spirituality. It doesnt have to be god either, I can be non religious stuff too or even places or rituals. I would say having something that is sacred to you is what matters and not god. Im not sure if sacred is the right word but thats what I use. Like ButterflyEffect mentions that cemeteries make him feel spiritual and I think its because of the weight he gives to those places, the sacredness of it, that helps. It can be rituals that you have been following for a lifetime and those can be sacred to you. Ive read about martial artists that have these kinds of rituals who say it helps them tap into their spiritual feelings. It can be places too. That is something that clicked about religions for me. Consider a church, it uses all of these ideas, of a god, sacred important rituals and a sacred place all together at the same time. Thats how I guess it works with people's spirituality and in this way I see things in religions that takes me back to it now even though I was atheistic for sometime. But god isnt the biggest factor there but other stuff like this.

I am generally guided by the feeling of wholeness in spirituality but sometimes Ive to turn it off and work against the general ideas of my spirituality. For example, when I have to get some studying done, tuning in to my ego which I usually subdue and being an ambitious bastard really helps. Its like using a painkiller when we are in pain which isnt very natural but is ok as long as we dont end up addicted to it. I said I was turning off my spirituality because subduing the ego is a big part but here Im not doing that. My expression wasnt very accurate and Its more like Im using the ego within the framework of my spirituality. Part of it is having the concept of wholeness guide me but its turned off then, Im not caring about that in those points of time.

It may seem vague when Im trying to say these stuff and I understand what happens with religions. Something I think is, if we understand life really close, being alive has everything in itself to make us blissful but we also need rationality and ego to keep ourself alive which we get caught up in and gets in the way. Its like babies are born with that kind of bliss and they learn to use the ego and the rational mind and get caught up in it and then we slowly learn to get closer to life but while keeping our ego. That reminds me so much of the story of adam who was born into the garden of eden or state of eternal bliss and then lost it when he discovered the ego and has to find his way back to it and is supposed to do it by following his spirituality.

And hence the idea of rationality as against spirituality. I wouldnt say against because we require it and its very much a part of my spiritual ideas but it can be detrimental if we arent careful. It was my rationality that helped me find the spirituality within me and it definitely isnt against it. The end point requires that I be devoid of logic and also my ego. I have to be rational when moving towards that.To condemn logic and the ego and to bring about the bliss is something I can do but that would be premature and isnt wholesome.