In about February in 2001 I realized that there was nothing I loved more than women. Not just physically, not just sexually, but emotionally, socially, aesthetically. I deeply, truly, entirely enjoy the company of women, young, old, introvert, extrovert, single, married, straight, lesbian, doesn't matter. Women are much more interesting than men, much more complex, much more fun to look at, much more pleasant to smell, nicer to hug, better to get your hair cut by, you name it. I decided at that moment (in a bar, drinking Midori on the rocks, listening to a Swedish death metal band, as I recall) that I could do a lot worse than strive to surround myself with beautiful women of all stripes in all parts of my life. In March of 2001 I realized that I had been well on my way towards the actualization of this goal prior to meeting my girlfriend at the time, who had pushed every other woman in my life away, leaving me isolated from my closest friends, my most casual acquaintances, even my family. On September 10, 2001, I reached out to a dear female friend she'd pushed away back in 1997. On September 13, 2001, we broke up after four and a half years. More accurately, she dumped me, because she knew I couldn't. I liked her family too much and her family (her sister, her mother, her aunt, her cousin Marisa…) knew that once I was out the door, she'd begin a long and terrible spiral towards oblivion. And on September 14, 2001 I called that friend again and met up with her and her best friend, a girl I'd never been close enough to because of her boyfriend, and unknowingly started down the road of making her my wife. I've had zero women chased away since.
Interesting that you can pinpoint so accurately. I recently broke up with a girlfriend of 4.5 years for a bit of a similar reason, although I can't say precisely when I realized it's what I had to do. Sometime in the last year--in the summer is when it got bad--I realized that what I want out of life is a family of my own. I spend as much time as I can with my niece (an adorable Japanese-American 20 mo old) and it's made me realize that I think I'd be a pretty decent family man, which is odd, because I've never seen myself in that role. In fact, I think I've actively pursued relationships that I knew had no chance of becoming permanent. So, I took stock of my situation, realized that my current girlfriend, whom I lived with, a seriously complicating issue, would make an absolutely terrible wife and mother, so I did what I knew was an inevitability and broke up with her (which I felt terrible about until it came to my attention that she was a huge whore anyway--makes one feel a lot less guilty). It's these kind of tough choices that help make us into stronger people, I think. I'm not used to putting my own feelings above those of others, but at some point, we need to think about ourselves. Breaking up with a person you care about (even if you harbor a lot of resentment and anger under the surface) is about the toughest thing you can do. But for me, it's been the best choice I've made in a very long time.