Final: Thanks for the memories folks. While not always showing the best of us, this was a great shared experience, i think.
I was blown away by the achievement of the last editable poem. I think the end product that was created was something truly special. While I think it would be foolish to attempt to recreate an experience like that, I am a fool and I loved watching it grow and shift in my feed. I would love to see one grow again.
Therefore, I messaged thenewgreen and asked if I could steal their idea wholesale. they agreed, and so I copy/paste now:
- Using this random poem generator I received this:
Noise, death, and work.
Action, death, and work.
Windows shrink like old workers.
Walk slowly like a misty worker.- My idea is that people be able to add to this poem. We can add stanzas, lines, we can remove words from what is currently there, and we can change it all together. We can erase and start over. There is no loyalty to what exists here. A number of us have been given access to "edit" this post. If you would like to be added to this, let me know.
You need not tell people it was you that wrote whatever.... do this under anonymity. Let's see how this thing changes. Please do not edit the above original poem, but do so here:
Close your eyes. This life is tiresome,
and hurled against the wind, it burns.
The scalded flesh reveals your figure,
And you become un-wounded. Bones
exposed through burning facade.
I could work all day and never
move an inch closer to you.
I'm a weathervane pointing
beyond the storm, into the blue.
I polished windows until I didn't
like their bright new veneers.
False rooster, rubber rocket, listen
to Roethke: go away, somewhere
you think you need to go. Foothills
of hysteria. You'd expect the dead
man's curve: xerox zero Rosie,
but it's bowties and trumpet tubing
from here on out. Little ram-shackled
summer-homes baking together
like cookies, every one a family.
Under the words that were omitted
lie the noise, work, and death
Missing workers walk slowly,
stop to take each breath.
Under the words that were deleted
I sit here with the few
Trying not be defeated
I move an inch closer to you.
Cut me down a tree,
Dragged it to the sea.
Made me clearly see
How much you mean to me.
well, this ended badly. did this happen to the last one?
The first one went through many incarnations. None like that, but it was erased, started over etc. It could be taken back to one word. That's the cool thing, it's temporary. Don't get attached.
well, now we start again. I guess that's the risk you take when make something that's editable by many people who you don't know in real life.
This poem is going a bit beboish. Or at least it was when I first saw it. On a side note, is that random poem generator legit? This is almost too perfect an illustration of the aftermath of a pirate sea raid: Life is a dead wind.
All sharks fight rough, warm seas.
The girl falls like a clear seashell.
The captain dies like a old lad.
Never fight a pirate.
It got really dark for a bit, but it's definitely going some interesting places.
I don't know why this was a funny to me as it was, but god damn i almost spat coffee all over my laptop.
That was fun and tragic and triumphant. What a surprise following the life and death of lines and ideas. I think the final version is, well, notable! I see you took down the "edit" button, so at this point only you know who was included. I'm going to post a what did we learn question perhaps you could shout it out to those who were on the list.Final: Thanks for the memories folks. While not always showing the best of us, this was a great shared experience, i think.
i... uhh... just kind of deleted it and didn't write it down. I'm a dingus.