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Inspiring :) That's some proper dedication. Imo, things like philosophy require education and formal time spent only to be able to give you the opportunity to converse with people, which is to me the most important thing. Find people or places online to just talk about it, the more informal the setting the better, that's all the dedication you'll need :)Even though I didn't get in on my first two attempts I am working VERY hard at making my dream come true.