Looking at what I wrote it's a pile of shit. I took a few pain meds to battle the pain from a strep infection and I'm feeling a little woozy. It is at least decent description of what bartenders have to do to try and prevent sexual assault.

I stop a few rapes a year at my job.

It is my professional responsibility to not let people get insensibly drunk it does occasionally happen. Often a secondary intoxicant is the gateway insensibly drunk, two drinks can look a lot like ten if you have been playing around in the medicine cabinet. The ones on meds are the hardest to deal with, they seem fine after one drink and they can barely stand after two.

Often a person who ends up insensibly drunk doesn't come to the bar but has someone else serving buying them drinks (we have no table service so if it's very busy fuck if we know what's going on our large patio). I'd say that about 90% of people who are too drunk to have free will (the ability to know who they are with, where they are going, and what is really happening to them) make it to the bar at some point before they get out the door.

It's my job to figure out if ladies that smashed are accompanied by someone they can trust before they get out the door and to separate them from predators if I feel they are in danger.

I did say ladies, not because I am unaware that men can be raped but I've never had to save a man from a male predator. I know that there have been men in danger of being taken home by someone with bad intentions at my bar before but I didn't have to handle it. We have a number of fantastic groups of gay regulars at my bar and they seem to always act as a community to stop things like that from happening.

First thing is did they come in with this person they are leaving with or were they talking with that person before they were trashed. If they knew the person before they were shit faced, how did they relate to each other before booze, how are they acting to each other now. This shit is dicey, you do your best to figure out who people are to each other and if they are decent human beings or vile bastards. usually someone is going to the bathroom before these people start to leave, I use that time to do some hard questioning of what ever party I am left talking with.

If you can't figure out if they knew that person before they came in it's red fucking flag time. You can ask a wasted girl if she knows the guy that's holding her up and if she knew him before tonight and she will sometimes say yes even when it isn't true. Because they are trying to leave they have usually cashed out with a credit card so you have at least some parties names. I ask both parties what the other persons name is, if they fail this test I tell the guy to get the fuck out. If they get by the name test and the girl has strongly stated her desire to leave with this guy (yeshh, I....wannnnttts tooo go wish heemm, it's gooodd...) I've done things like take the guys picture and tell him that if he is the white knight he is pretending to be than he has nothing to worry about he will be happy that I've taken the time to try and keep this young lady safe.

If a guy just seems like a totally scummy piece of shit and is trying to get a smashed lady out the front door I just kick him out when the lady goes to the bathroom.

There are always a selection of men who come to the bar that are known creepers. Doesn't make them a rapist but I'm not letting a girl go home with a known creeper if I haven't seen them together before. The "I can't believe that you did that bro, I had that shit in the bag, I thought you were my friend, fuck you man you aren't cool,) shtick that I've received after preventing a terrible thing from happening is truly sickening.

I've seen women who's habits and tastes are well known to me decide to get smashed and end up being led out the door by a man or men they would never even give the time of day to if they were sober.

I've called the cops to get women put in the drunk tank rather than leave with a dude I don't trust.

Several time under strong questioning I've seen a guy who professed to be the boyfriend of or the friend of a smashed women leave when the questioning started to go the wrong way. I've seen them run when asked if they are trying to rape a women.

I'm sure that women who were too smashed to consent to anything have slipped by me and been raped. That sucks, it's enough to make me unable to feel proud of saving anyone from a predator.

I wish people would not drink so much that they are unable to say yes or no or even understand what is happening to them.

I will talk to my daughter about using appropriate care while doing drugs but I know that isn't enough to keep her safe against all dangers. There are many shitty evil people out there and they are capable of terrible deeds.