I went to a CLE (continuing legal education) thing at my alma mater last week. The theme was restorative justice, basically the idea that there may be better responses to crime than just throwing people in jail. It was good to see the work being done, and also that it was being done by people actually in a position to do something (some of the speakers included a local trial judge and a prosecutor). The last speakers were a couple of guys who had only recently gotten out of prison for murder, and who helped co-found a local group trying to stop street violence before it starts. They were really amazing, and I had a good conversation with one of them afterwards. You can tell when people get It, even if you couldn't explain what It is, and these two get It.

The keynote was given by Dr. Johonna Turner, who is with the Zehr Institute for Restorative Justice at Eastern Mennonite University, just up the road. To start with, and I recognize the unfairness of this, she was the first person I've ever heard use words like "intersectionality" without making it sound like all the ills of the world are my fault as a white cisgendered male. She managed to talk about these things and somehow make it feel like everyone in the room (or me, when I was talking to her later) was in it together. I probably spent an hour talking to her after the main event ended, and even ended up giving her a ride back to her hotel afterwards. She was very patient with my fumbling attempts to talk about issues of gender and race.

Meanwhile, I'm in the market for a new psychiatrist, as the one I had is leaving practice (or at least the local one). I was able to get in with one earlier this week, but I was not impressed. Apropos of nothing he started talking about how when he did inpatient work, most of his job was in sussing out fraudulent requests for hospitalization, and spent a good chunk of our appointment bemoaning drug-seeking behavior. He doesn't take depression seriously as a thing, totally blowing off my own issues with that particular condition (which are getting worse of late). He talked about the low success rate of a given antidepressant as if that were meaningful, especially given that it's basically impossible to know if a given drug will work for a given person ahead of time (and objectively measuring the effectiveness is super difficult). It was all very surreal, and I get the impression that he's out on his own because of anger at The System. But it's also clear that he's very stuck in his ways, and is more interested in them than listening to me. (This was further supported by the fact that he kept talking about out-of-pocket costs despite my having insurance, and that we spent half my appointment going through the questions that I'd already filled out on the intake paperwork.) Ironically one of the things that I was excited about was that, according to his intake person when I made the appointment, he typically avoids stimulants in treating ADHD. I'd be glad to change, because the med crash is a bitch. He instead prescribed a stimulant. To be fair, he did say that this one tends to be a more gradual come down, although I'm skeptical of his statement that I wouldn't notice it wearing off. I still have a couple months of meds from my previous doc, so at least I have some time.

Today's my 3rd day in Eindhoven, and it's been awesome so far. Eating delicious vegan food every day, slowly getting to know the 40 young folks in the crew, biking everywhere, barely drinking. Feels super wholesome - I think I needed that in my life right now after the crazy summer of debauchery I've had. Prepping for dutch design week right now and getting in the groove of the film crew.

I wish i could have gotten here earlier honestly, seems like it's been lots of fun and the project is wrapping up in december. But the founder is very seriously looking into buying land in Portugal and building an alternative community. Pretty much a hippy commune, but a high tech version where you document your processes and share it all open source and do R&D for sustainable living.

AHHHH. (This is another relationship vent brought to you by kantos)

5 jars of your most fermented jam. Throw in the whole trash bag too, please.

I'm my mind is numb from the level of face plant I just achieved.

   Invite girl over for dinner 
   Proceed to have nice meal
   Gets to that moment of make a move or not
   Ask bluntly after a nice night if she's looking for a relationship
   "Not particularly"
   Land softly with a couple minutes of not awkward conversation
   Exit the girl

Gonna ride out the feeling of the L for the duration of the evening. Then call friends in the morning to get back on the buck.

Fortunate enough I can bounce back with a game plan, but damn that was rough.

I'm taking a warm shower, and going to bed for a mental reset.

Night hubs. o7

I was in Paris for 4 days. It changed me. I saw what life should be like. It should take 3 hours to have lunch. You should walk everywhere you go. You should only build buildings worth building. You should have the largest and most beautiful of those buildings dedicated to showcasing art.

The people have a leisurely way to them, while also having a definitive style. It’s remarkable. It’s a remarkably beautiful place. It’s the new gold standard for cities for me.

I’ll return.

Some sort of quid pro quo badge thing going on here...

One of my cats learned how to kill birds and proceeded to attempt a neighborhood genocide. He went from not killing birds to killing one or two a day.

We ordered some bell collars and his kill count went down to one every two days.

We have more bells coming today, they are supposedly louder and ring easier than the ones we have.

I took his collar off today to adjust the bells (he was able to hook their rings on his teeth). He bolted during the collar adjustment and came back 20 min later with a bird.

If I can't get the bird kill rate down to something like one a year than he'll only be able to go outside at night.

He's a hell of a cat. The vet just saw him and said something like "this is what a healthy cat should look like!" He's lean fit and smart. I've never had a smart cat before.

Hope I can get a handle on his murderous behavior.

I'm drinking Broken Top bourbon from Sisters Oregon, I think they have bourbon figured out at their price point.

Well I don't know who to believe now.

https://imgur.com/a/PbyGotd

Found this photo from a few years ago - my first foray into beers that weren't easy to quaff lagers.

I got it cause it had a funny name, Jack the Sipper, turns out I really like dark beers and thus I was converted. It's certainly not as heavy as the beers I moved onto, but I have a strong nostgalic feel for my first "different" beer.

I'll meet you halfway:

time for a new logo?

"Hubski: pushing out the dark"

Sure, i can record some russian chatter for you, sounds like fun :) I only have a shitty laptop microphone tho. Anything specific I should say?