Sorry, disappeared for the weekend.

This isn't something I really deal with all that often, but sometimes, and I do see it around a good bit. I don't so much mind being wrong about things, but I do mind when I'm made to feel as if I've done something wrong when my intentions are good but I just haven't been caught up on the latest codeword. It all seems rather arbitrary and unfair to give anyone shit about it, which I think is what really gets me going.

I don't want it just to be easy for me or I wouldn't bother with any of this. Anyway, no, option 1 isn't really trying hard enough on my part.

Also, lots of people have different reactions to different words.

This is the problem I'm getting at. The trend is always moving along on the whole, but at any given time, you can find a lot of different preferences about this. I don't have a problem with making the effort for individuals I know, but when communicating with a group or posting online, I can feel pulled in various directions as to what words I should be using.

I guess one solution could be to check what the latest polite/clinical term is every so often (must be written down somewhere) but some of these terms are so far gone they feel disingenuous.

But, hey, I go around preaching to internet grammar pedants about how they should chill out and let the language evolve, so maybe that's all that's happening -- seems disorientingly fast sometimes though.

Sometimes it seems like people don't look past the words to the intent. They just see the word as packaging a certain intent necessarily. Saying the wrong word can make you the bad guy when they don't check inside to see what's really being communicated.