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galen  ·  3411 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Lil's Book of Questions: What Do You Need in a Relationship?

In a similar vein, I would amend #3 to Mutual Trust. One of the most frustrating things about my last relationship was that while I was totally comfortable opening up to my SO, discussing emotions, fears, hopes, etc., she rarely if ever consented to share her feelings. When I asked how she was, it was always fine, and anytime I wanted to make sure she was okay, she (somewhat sharply) insisted that everything was normal. After a while, that lack of trust got to me.

Of course she also withheld physical closeness-- not as a means of persuasion, but simply because she wasn't interested at the time. It was rather a selfish behavior than a controlling one.

lil