especially after I really got deep into philosophy- particularly existentialism and things similar

Mind posting some links? I've hit a roadblock recently and would like some possibly new material to look at.

Maybe it's because I got high for the first time last month, and it was on a very concentrated form of dabs.

I'v never been high and never plan to. Though your comment reminds me of other people who get high and then comment online. That little snippet read similarly.

I think it's easy to complain. It's easy to hate, it's easy to want to die.

I was thinking the exact opposite. Most people seem to be happy-go-lucky and like literally anything I show them. If I think it sucks or is okay they'll usually love it. If i show them what I particularly like they either think it's the best thing ever or completely hate it.

As for death, I don't think most people want to die. According to surveys, most people have never had the thought cross their minds. And I personally don't want to die, just be somewhere else.

But while you're living, while you're here, taking a moment to love and appreciate what you already love and appreciate really, really helps.

I don't really "love" anything. Never have. Lusted, sure. Enjoyed, totally. Liked? yup. Never loved though. Not one single thing. Be it person, experience, or thing. I threw around the word a lot when I was younger, but I realize that I didn't actually love anything that I said it towards. It was more of an immediate want/like.

And from there, you can start to find other things to love as well.

As I just mentioned I have yet to find anything like that. But things I enjoy are few and far between as well. Most things are obscure. My music I like have 10-50 listeners on Last.FM. The anime I watch is a bit more popular. As for just general things I like/would like to see more of, they virtually don't exist. Only in obscure places on the internet. And that's if I'm lucky. A lot of stuff I enjoy can't physically exist due to the laws of nature.

I guess what I'm saying is, find everything you love, not just one thing, and stick to that shit.

I've surrounded myself with stuff I enjoy. That doesn't seem to be the problem. The problem is boredom. And socializing. I've grown tired of the things I enjoy, as they don't bring me anything new. And I can't discuss my thoughts or opinions with people as most people don't seem to care to. And 99% of the time I open my mouth (to anyone mind you) I'm ignored.