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This is the crux of the issue: are we concerned about people taking advantage of transgender norms in order to further their cisgender motives? Or are we only pretending to be? I worked for a Disadvantaged Business Enterprise that did all sorts of contracting. We still had to get the work. We often didn't. We had more opportunities than we might have had with a male president, but not enough to care about. Certainly not enough to bother going Tootsie on it. And that was government work anyway. You get zero legs up as a DBE in the private sector. I agree with you on the "ban all marriages" front and have said as much for years. But that's not going to happen and we all know it.