(_refugee_ too) Y'all are certainly helping with refining how I'm feeling. Is there a such thing as social exhaustion from meeting people? Because, despite the tech thing, there are three days of the week where I'm involved with three separate organizations/places/whatever that have been a completely offline way of meeting folks, and yet, at the same time meeting people in general feels like a chore and the same path of events and discussions. Maybe living in 5 places in 3.5 years and going through this process time and time again filled with meeting people and short term relationships has taken some of the fun out of it. And I'm only interested in certain demographics of people as far as relationships go, and friends for that matter. Both of which are more of personal problems than anything else.
Ya know... I think I'm reading something between the lines in your comments... I don't think you are "whole" right now. And you can't be a good partner to someone, unless you are first good to yourself. Moving 5 times in 3+ years is a BIG sign. It takes TIME to get settled in. To figure out who you are in this new place. To find your rhythms. And you can dance with someone else until you can figure out your own rhythms. I think maybe you are pushing it too hard. Rushing into something that you know you aren't going to be completely committed to, and therefore self-sabotaging. BUT. I think you are doing the right things. Settling in. Doing the three-days-a-week stuff. Making friends. Being YOU. So be YOU for a while. Get comfortable. Only then will you become someone that others want to snuggle with. (All meant in good spirit. No abuse/jibes intended.)
Thanks goobster, definitely no jibes felt. I think you're completely right. The best part is I'm likely to move again in a few months (staying the same region, but still). The cycle of move or do something new - make friends - keep friends for a period of time - repeat is a lot more draining that I thought it would be, and, to be clear on the last point there are people who to snuggle with me at this point in time but not entirely sure where I'm at mentally to be doing like that.
People with a similar level of interest in music and local artist, musicians, and local culture, mostly. Chances are if a person has enough of a passion to be involved small and local, they'll have some of the same values as me. In the process that shuts out a lot of people though but eh. That was nondescript but I'm apparently the only person with the viewpoint I've been trying to express and I'm tired of trying to articulate things right now.