Thanks for the thoughtful comment @thenewgreen. I was trying to make a point in this piece, so I underscored my reluctance to embrace my heritage fully. But it was definitely the case that I felt strangely at home in Germany, even though I had never been there before. Sometimes the sensation unnerved me, as when I was unable to press that doorbell. Looking back on my year abroad, though, I'd have to say that feeling that connection to my family's past did have a positive effect on my sense of self, even if I'm wary of the idea that one can return to one's old homeland.
I think part of the connection people feel to lands they've never been to is a longing to be part of a narrative that stretches well beyond themselves. Also, the "homeland" is a promise of what could be, a place that is devoid of the problems of your current local. But, like so many things; religion, sports, politics etc, calling something your "homeland" gives you a sense of belonging. Being able to say, "I'm a ____" is a powerful thing to us humans. Thanks for the response Charlie.I'm wary of the idea that one can return to one's old homeland.
-I've thought about this often in regards to displaced people. After a certain amount of time, after a generation has passed is it still their "homeland?" Jews and Palestinians come to mind but such questions come loaded with things like religion and decades (or centuries) of animosity and violence. I wonder though, would it immediately feel like home if it were bequeathed to them? The question could be posed to the African American population too. They were stolen from their "homeland" but so much time has elapsed is it still their homeland?