For those keeping track at home, I haven't had a fever in at least a week but I've had a mild cough for ten days and exhaustion for about that long. Somehow I ended up with a really shitty ear infection. I'm well enough to go grocery shopping and make meals, so I'm going grocery shopping and making meals.
Yeah, fuck you. I'm going grocery shopping and making meals. I haven't had a fever in a week, I'm self-isolating to the best of my abilities and as the owner of a medical clinic, allow me to say with no quaver in my voice that eight hours of calls by our receptionist on Thursday revealed zero (0) pathways for testing. Quest is rolling out a "every virus except the coronavirus" panel which we hope to have some of by Tuesday and we've been told that Lab Corps has a test we can request "with discretion" that will be sent to their headquarters in St. Louis for a 4-5 day turnaround. And while yeah - theoretically UW can test 1000 samples a day we know people at UW, we transport to UW, we're known to UW and we hit an absolute brick wall. Meanwhile Evergreen has stone cold stopped testing outpatients because according to the CDC, coronavirus is "endemic to the region" which means when they find it, well what did you expect anyway.
Now go play with this shiny tool from am_Unition's post
And recognize that by any reasonable model we're off the charts by Wednesday.