I debated heavily on whether or not to say this, now knowing that I am speaking to almost uniformally a male crowd, but the fact I now feel pressured not to post in and of itself rather prompts the necessity...

Truth is, I find the gender ratio really disturbing. I asked Dupurz about the sample size and he told me 126 people took the survey. Given mk is followed by nearly 700 people, we can come to a few conclusions: Either the sample size is around 1/6 and not a true representation, or there are a lot more registered users than active ones.

Given lil's information that:

The earlier test of 101 people was 6/95, or about 6% non-male.

I instantly wondered why? Why are there so few females here? What is it about places like this that drive females away? It can't be that it's geared towards males, because we ourselves decide the content, and besides, WoW is geared towards males and it has a thriving female population and no one questions that fact there.

Dupurz answered my wonders with, "It's because most of the people on hubski are redditors." But that only leads to, 'Why are most redditors male?'

The answer I found for that was that hubski is the place redditors went because they got tired of reddit which was the place digg people went when they got tired of digg which was the place 4chan people went after getting tired of 4chan. And 4chan (if my internet history is correct) is the birthplace of "tits or gtfo."

But surly, surely, Intimidating Scones, we as the 4th generation successor have evolved past all that! Surely?...

According to the time stamp, only one day after I was "outed" as female, this assertion showed up on my first post to hubski:

He treated you as a guy, probably out of respect.

It was the final insult after multiple misogynistic statements. 'Out of respect?' Is that implying it is disrespectful to be treated as who I am? That treating me as a woman would be treating me worse than treating me as a man? Sorry hubski, but you're sexist.

Yes, yes, I know, it was one person! Not fair to call hubski as a whole sexist! But, then again, this post was global number one for days, and the day this comment was made, the post was the day's community top post. So, not only was there much discussion in the thread, and many people saw it, no one -- no one -- called this person out for their sexism. The post was even upvoted. The only comment below was answering the commenter's question, "Why didn't you [link your book?]" Which was answered simply, "She did."

So there is the difference between the two: Blizzard has a no tolerance attitude towards discrimination.

Now I understand Blizzard can pay people very well to lay the smack-down on any and all discriminatory or otherwise offensive bullshit, and hubski just honestly doesn't have the same resources.

But doesn't that mean it's up to all of us to speak out and make this community a place where everyone is welcome? If someone is discriminated against in their second day contributing to the community, I would expect them to want to leave and never look back (I honestly almost did). And if we stay silent while someone else discriminates against the new kid on the block, we are literally letting them speak for us and our community.

According to this graph, we could have double the community. I think we ourselves could make that happen, and make this place the center of human interaction we all look towards it to be.

Whenever I answer this question people gawk at me and all I can do is throw my hands up and shout, "SO I OVERCOMPENSATED! SUE ME!"

But I've always been self-conscious about my inteligence. AUGH! See?? See what I mean?? Don't you see the... spelling....error?

My family was brutal about it. I'm the youngest in a family of geniuses (two of whom act kind of like Sheldon from Big Bang Theory sometimes.) I remember in first grade coming home to exclaim, "I know addition!" My sisters laughed and taught me multiplication. When I went back to school to get my friend's approval, exclaiming, "I know multiplication!" I got bullied until I cried. 'Twas a lonely childhood.

My constant struggles with reading speed and spelling never helped, and then I learned at 15 I was dyslexic. Not just oh kinda sorta dyslexic, but I had visual dyslexia, auditory dyslexia, and discalculia all to severe degrees.

But I'm also an "eat your fear" kind of gal (high-five, Saydrah!) and didn't give up on my dream to be a writer. I majored in the hardest field for a dyslexic, kicked college's buttox and for the most part am pretty damn pleased with myself for it.

I know I'm smart. It's just sometimes I go on rampages to prove it.

(Anecdotally, I'm also really self-conscious about "Oh god how do I hubski!?")

Point and fact:

Most of the discussion in here is over validity of commenting to scientific journalism, but I have something to say about it in regards to creative work. Particularly, what the Viheart video made me think of. When she talked about being confident in your work and sharing it because you made something, reminded me of something my childhood mentor told me around the time I made the leap to adulthood. It was about love.

She told us (my class, with me drawing somewhere off in the second row...) about true love. She said that when you're young you often find someone who makes you comfortable, or maybe excites you, and you want to shout to the high heavens "You complete me!" But that's mostly... well, hormones.

To truly know true love, you must first complete yourself. Once you know who you are, really know who you are, and gain an appreciation and love for yourself and all the confidence and humility that comes with it, then you're ready to love someone else. She said it wasn't fair to put the pressure on someone else to 'complete' you. You just met! You just started dating! You've known one another for like three months! That's three month compared to the 16 years we had all known ourselves. It wasn't fair, and it wasn't true.

I took that to heart, and stopped looking for outward approval, and began looking for it within myself. The happy result there is regardless to my point.

My point, is to apply this to both posting and commenting. When a creator feels complete, comments don't make or break them. Obviously Viheart is there. When you don't feel valid, probably because no one told you that you could validate yourself (or maybe you did and something horrible happened that you now must confront), you'll look for ways to feel valid, such as creating and being loved, tearing apart something someone else has created, or finding someone (or something) to 'complete' you. But once you do the work to find out who you are, those compulsions dissipate.

Am I saying to stop creating or posting until you've validated yourself? No. Just do it in the context that you know you need to be a little easier on yourself and a little more self-loving.

Am I saying you need to take yourself out for a romantic, candle-lit dinner, just you and your beloved self? It seriously couldn't hurt.

And as a preemptive strike to those who have someone who completes you while knowing you yourself are complete, I say: When you say they complete you, what you really mean is you are complete, and they are complete and together the two of you kick so much ass that you never want to be without them again because seriously, you and this person rock all kinds of awesome. It's okay to say it. Cuz you (and I) know what you mean.

Yeah they didn't put H1N2 in the flu shot this year and that's what's going around. So it's more of a preview of what would happen without a flu shot than a problem with super bugs.

On a side not, always finish your antibiotics, boys and girls. Nobody likes super bugs.

I understand what you're saying about being careful with labeling, but I would like to note that what wasn't mentioned in the article is what defines autism or Asperger's. Shy, introverted, easily overwhelmed, and quirky are results of the things that cause Asperger's not what makes the definition themselves.

Some of the things that define Asperger's is that they literally sense the world differently. Their senses work differently. Noises are louder, they can hear pitches most people can't, lights are brighter (louder, too, if you will), they sometimes see as if the world were a badly tuned rabbit-ear TV, they are often super-tasters, they feel things more...well just more. A girl with Asperger's told me once, "I'd rather be punched than tickled."

Other things are that they can't read expressions and nuances very well. Because of this they often struggle to express themselves. I can only imagine this would cause a lot of the symptoms in and of itself. I'd be introverted, shy, and easily overwhelmed too.

Frustration can very much lead to very dark things. But honestly, the world is full of every kind of frustration and anyone can reach their limit.

There are a lot of legal rights you're forgetting that help marriage along. Mostly about the time of dying but not yet dead.

Also, these 'parties' and 'Princess Fantasies' are for the most part becoming cheaper and more moderate. They are often done for the benefit and appeasing of close family, particularly parents. And if you don't want to attend and show support to two people starting out, don't RSVP. It's rather simple.

Moreover, women aren't the only ones with a lot of fantasies about their 'big day.' I was surprised to learn this too, but really, what's wrong with wanting to celebrate committing yourself to another person for life? I know a lot of cynicism comes from high divorce rates, but give humanity a chance. Seriously, we hear about the people who get married 5 times and the people who have been married for 50 years, and we don't hear about those who have been faithful for 8. Why? Because it's not a juicy story. But if you don't take them into account, then things get very skewed.

I'm curious to know, if marriage wasn't a legal thing and weddings were a thing of the past, and two close friends of your told you they had decided to commit themselves to one another forever, and you remember that when you and your SO did that, that the money you got from so-and-so made all the difference, would you feel more like helping them out? Partially because you're not obligated to?

One person's heaven is another person's hell. This description of self-actualization sounds a lot like the concept behind Siddhartha's goals of finding nirvana. I've thought a lot on the idea of having nothing that can upset me throughout my young adult life, and I keep coming to the realization that having nothing to solve would eventually bore me. I personally thrive on change. Being a monk would drive me insane.

However, the idea of striving for my absolute perfection would absolutely tear me apart! Never being happy with where I am at this particular moment in time would be to spend the majority if not the entirety of my life never knowing the contentment of living in the present.

I think it's wort noting, I wrote the above during an emotional outpour, fully expecting it to be passed over. It is the unadulterated thoughts during a moment of pain and desperation, woven out instinctively into something resembling poetry.

I love writing, and I love the voice I write with.

Thank you so much, all of you who liked what I had to say and encouraged me along. I also appreciate those who tried to help by giving me suggestions on some drastic style changes. But this was more hopeful for the former than expectant of the latter. But more than that, it was simply meant to BE. it was a sudden profusion I felt compelled to share.

I appreciate that it was read so much and garnered so much discussion! This is indeed an incredibly interesting community.

I understand that today most writers like words, words, words, punch. But if you notice the writers I listed as admiring, they all use the technique of weaving words so that each idea connects not with the next but with the one after. This is why you're getting such a smooth feeling and missing the punch. The point is the weave of it.

I fear that when I write, I uselessly speak to mute ashes.

was woven with

And so I may uselessly speak to mute ashes....

above it, which was woven with

I arrive here, brother, at this miserable funeral,

Above that, which weaves into

It matters none that I bleed, and read the blood profussed so wondrously by these writers long dead.

If read in the order of the original post, the interweavings gives not a punch but a dawning realization.

You've actually reiterated my frustration that people prefer to be punched than to sit and contemplate the dawn.

I...I'm honored. I didn't really know what I'd been given at first, but Duperz explained it fuller and all I can say is... I'm touched. Thank you. You all have made me feel very... warm. I hate to sound regurgitatingly melodramatic but I kinda needed some love. Some acceptance. Duperz is all I've had for a bit of a long time. Don't get me wrong, the man has moved mountains, but now all of you are helping him. So, thank you.

I never expected anything as heartwarming as all this. Thank you.

Hey, I'm late to the game, but Google docs is a safe way to link and get exactly the format you're looking for. Also, I wouldn't worry about length. If you think it's too long, just post a word count in the description.

Also, if you didn't know this already, if it's an original work, in the United States at least the copy write laws say you don't have to be registered to put you name with the © symbol next to it. Being registered just makes is easy (possible?) to press charges against your work being stolen. You can get the symbol by putting on the numb lock then holding alt as you type 0169. In other words, Numb + Alt + 0169. I recommend it for all amateur writers.

Thanks. Both of you.

And, oh I'll keep bleeding. Problem is I can't friggin stop!

If I may add 2 cents... I've never been a redditor (Though I love the Latin name). I tried it, and immediately got angry with exactly what MattolomewCup said above about the one-dimentionalness that pervaded and became like a plague. But what kept me from ever trying again (and what worried me about trying new and similar sites...) was the horrific mass of UNwritten rules atop the written ones.

I love the way hubski is geared towards conversation and mature debate as opposed to rage comics. But I'll be honest, I also want a place that's a community support for things like "Hey, I just started to learn chainmailing! Look at my hauberk!" My hope is that this starts conversation without me needing to add a pretentious "AMA." Everyone knows that a friendly community would indeed feel free to ask away.

Augh this is a novel! Long story short, I want to be able to say "I did this; go read it!" without breaking some unwritten rules.

Maybe it's best to (and I think this is indeed the goals of the admins given the changes) simply use our ability to share, follow, and filter in order to 'vote' on what we want hubski to look like.

Look at it without the distraction of colors.

Scribd----------50/50 foursquare-----48/52 instagram------53/47 youtube--------46/54 pininterest-----72/28 reddit----------26/74 hubski-----------5/95

Now, the last one may be drastically different due to sample size.

I understand that. Most of the discussion in the thread that spun this one was assuming not though.

I also find it interesting to note how much of an uproar the mere suggestion caused. That in and of itself may speak to a lot of this.

Hey, talking from experience of being on the other side of that, you know, dating the one who wonders if they're a good boyfriend:

When he opened up and and expressed that fear to me, and reiterated it when he was worried, it was very easy for me to soothe that worry. And I found it comforting to know I was able to do so, so it brought us closer rather than being any kind of pain to me.

I'm just an advocate of openness.

Careful on the assumptions there. How much a tipped-wage worker goes home with can vary from east side to west side of a town, much less different parts of the country. I worked at a corporate place and made less than $9.

Actually the company was not in the original post and the scrawled name was not widely legible. She didn't bring attention to the company, the angry customer did. The angle is about waitstaff not being treated as people.

Also, receipts are not in any way private. The computer has the credit card number, the receipt is just a way to say "you must pay this amount." The same result would have incurred if the offensive note had been left on a napkin.

And you can compare retail to waiting if you like, but it's a lot more accurate if you say waiting is like retail if when every time the clock is between 11 and 2, and 4 and 7 it's Black Friday.

I was being facetious about the belligerence; it's no news that more opinionated and 'entertaining to read' comments often get more attention than relevant ones on zeh interwebs.

I am honestly interested in how it works, jokes aside.

I'm not asking for the family recipe, I'm just wondering if there's anything I'm allergic to in it!

Well, you're crafty. I just talk too much. ;)

Fun reading your thoughts. Also, rolled reading the "Um." XD

But where is my pie!? Oh nvm.

I like your reactions, and am particularly impressed by 3.2. I admittedly have a very short fuse (I have my reasons, but there's not really an excuse for it ever), so hearing you're more of a zen master is interesting to me. You really never just... overreact to someshit? cuz you're cranky or otherwise?

Okay who created a 'throw away' account to make that post be uber ironic?? XD

I very much enjoyed reading all these things you said were likely to happen (I'm also tickled that the moment I thought of a possible outcome, your article went on to explain the same thought in detail!)

So, now that we know what's likely, tell us, what are you most hopeful for?

(I for one am hoping a lot of these reclaimed parking lots can be turned into parks and gardens, and help some cities with the "hot spot" effect.)

I'm so glad most of hubski is not like you.

I wholeheartedly agree. This quote defines not writing, but art. That is actually the title I've been cuddling to myself: I am an "artist." But it's hard to say to others because it brings the instant image of oil painting, Michelangelo, adorable fat cherubs.

The title is Journey of the Eumenides. Duperz linked it above, but here it is so you don't have to search. http://www.amazon.com/Journey-of-the-Eumenides-ebook/dp/B007...

I hesitate to encourage you to buy, since it isn't written with the same voice as my philosophical meandering thoughts above. Same passion yes. But a different read altogether. But judge for yourself. The free sample section is quite long.

Um, I'm going with this trend of goals rather than programming (sorry if we're getting off topic. It's just, I learned a foreign language already, and programming languages are way harder than Latin.)

My new forever project is a website where I can put up my hand drawn comics, link to my gaming videos, post my short stories and fan fics, update my...not novels...as I work on them, display my pencil sketches of my characters, and even my philosophical essays.

I started using a website builder, and was impressed at the really worthwhile quality I was getting from it, but, recently I just do that dreamy thing and keep on keepin' on.

We'll get into it further because you and your boyfriend are an informative case study.