I think gender is an interesting and difficult issue online.

I purposely picked a gender-neutral handle when I started - oh, can I call it "foruming"? - spending time on Reddit and then, Hubski. I didn't want to be judged for my gender. And, I don't mind it being assumed that I'm male. In fact, in many posts I'll deliberately not state my gender or omit facts that might point out that (shocker!) I'm a girl. In fact, the name I use for poetry writing is just my initals and my last name - gender neutral. I don't want gender to come into play when it comes to a person's online opinion of me. I don't mind it being assumed I'm male or "just one of the guys" or whatever.

To weigh in on the conversation going on with insomniasexx and theadvancedapes below: I have both male and female friends. Sometimes I feel more comfortable with males, sometimes with females. I think I generally like hanging out with males a little bit better but for me there's unfortunately also a trust element that comes into play with guys that doesn't with girls: can I trust this guy to respect my personal space, can I trust that he is going to maintain the friendship, essentially, instead of seeing me as potentially something more.

kleinbl00 gave me advice in that thread I posted about my brother being an asshole - you remember that one? - and treated me like a dude and gave me advice that I think might have been slightly different if he'd known I was female. But you know what? I want the male advice. I don't want the censored advice or the advice that speaks down to me because I'm the "weaker gender" and I don't have to "man up." Fuck that. I want to have to man up and be as aggressive about what's important to me as anyone else - any other man. If you've got expectations for a man in a given role - I want to meet them. I don't want them changed because maybe, somehow, I'm not capable.

Sometimes I get a chip on my shoulder about being female, or - physically - being small. Does this come through in how I shield my gender online? Maybe. But you know what, it's my chip, and my shoulder.