I’m back in town! Planning to move back to my apartment by December but it looks like my ex still has not found a place to move to. The market is tough, but also it’s been 3 months now… and it’s rough because he’s looking for a cheap place. I don’t want to be a dick and kick him out but I also need to move on.

I have a lot of thinking to do about what I’m looking for in a partner, because it almost feels like the qualities I want would not occur in a single person. But I’m not going to be dating for now. Probably need to stay single for a little while after 10 years with someone.

Also need to evaluate my next career move. My previous job solidified my worries about not being a fit for stable 9-5 office work. But it’s also the type of work I can most easily find and am most qualified for. My ideal contract-based, engaging, well paying and possibly remote position probably doesn’t exist. I still have time, but my friend was advising me not to do things Willy nilly like I have been and always keep in mind to build towards something. But that type of more long term thinking is giving me anxiety about the decisions I will have to be making soon. Because that could be anything from moving countries to going back to school to changing specialisation… I like to do meaningful shit but also would not mind being paid more at this point in my life, do something beyond entry level stuff. I’ve done a ton of interesting work in my life so far, but it’s getting frustrating how often the same question falls back on the table and it often doesn’t feel like I’ve made progress on finding an answer. Despite being a really competent person overall and good at getting shit done.