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What's the phrase? "bad pizza is like bad sex even at its absolute worst it's pretty goddamn good?" The thing of it is, NY and Chicago are irrationally proud of their pizza. There's a real foodie fundamentalism about it that's just weird - I mean, they eat their chili on spaghetti in Cincinnati but they don't pretend it's the only way to eat chili. If you're going to be fundie about it, look to the calzone. They only really work one way. I would argue that the pizza you get by unfolding a calzone flat is basically protomethian American pizza - it's the variation with the most utility, the broadest reach and the largest adoption. But I'm also known to argue that sushi as we know it post-dates refrigeration.