So the reason I don't call myself a feminist unless I feel like explaining myself is because it's too broad of a word so I'm not achieving anything by saying it. The term cultural appropriation has the same problem I feel. Are people dressing in drag considered offensive ? As a woman it doesn't bother me if a man puts on a dress or make up one night since they'll never actually be me. They will always be the man just in different clothing. Does dressing like a tomboy make me less of a woman for the day ? I think that's bullshit and it's 100% the other side of the coin. We can't say that a man is actually changing their experience by dressing in drag but say women are always women. They'll never change their overall life experience by throwing on a dress. Now am I going to get upset and think things like oh he can walk around in a dress without worrying about access to women's reproductive healthcare ? Not even a little, I can throw on some combat boots and put my hair in a ponytail without having to worry about getting weird looks at the park with my niece. ;)

I'm sure your're well aware of the whole controversy that now exists over feminists using language that suggests you need to be born female to be a woman. Like protest signs at the women's march saying things like pussy power alienating trans women. The thing is though that myself and a trans woman do not have the same life experience. I do not envy their life experience but we can't deny they are different. In the 70's they did a study ( and I do hope if they did it now it would be different however I'm thinking it won't have changed much.) were they took the same baby but dressed it in pink or blue to see how adults would react. When they thought the baby was female they talked about how beautiful she was and when they thought the baby was male they talked about what career he would have. So who is the woman's march for ? Is it wrong to discuss women's issues in the context of women who were born that way ? Are we allowed to talk about pussy power when it's about woman's reproductive health ? This isn't "cultural" but it's absolutely relevant to the discussion of different life experiences not being respected as such. Should it bother me that people who did not experience my childhood as a girl are trying to push into "my space" without taking on my baggage ? Are we not allowed to make clever slogans about our ovaries when we are talking about women's reproductive healthcare? Some people do think this which was evident after that march.

I agree with what WanderingEng said about intent, if a guy dresses like a girl and starts making fun of women I'll just show him up like I've done countless times in my life. Shit feels good. I don't want some guy in a dress to take on my baggage. I would rather he just know not to fuck with me. At my first job one of the managers I worked with uncomfortably asked me if I was expecting a certain job in the summer that my female manager was going to give to a male simply because they were male ( I was more qualified) since he knew me. When she mentioned it to two of my male managers they both told her to watch out because they knew I wouldn't just take that. I can't wash off my femininity but honestly I don't know why I would want too. I have baggage and I have problems but I take pride in myself and what my gender has achieved. I take pride in earning that job, and I take pride that my bosses knew I wouldn't accept anything less than I deserved. Men can enjoy their dress today and wearing pants when it's hot AF out to look "professional". I might not get treated with respect because I was born with certain parts but I get treated with respect in every job I've ever had because I demand it without having to dress less feminine. Sometimes I get annoyed that I have a bit more of a struggle but I actually find people who haven't struggled at all to be incredibly boring. Sometimes I falter and forget to respect myself enough or demand that others give me the same respect but I'm 23 ffs.

Is mocking another culture shitty ? Sure, but it's not fair to assume somebody is always mocking you. Blackface and the slanty eye thing are obviously mocking. Dressing in a kimono isn't mocking somebody, it's just enjoying a piece of clothing until you know, the slanty eyes come out.