a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment
mk  ·  4614 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: The Evil of Being "Normal"
Interesting stuff. I am a white, straight, male. I can empathize with the notion that this is a position from which one isn't expected to suffer. That is, if you've got all these things going for you, you are not expected to take the position of a victim.

IMHO the truth of the matter is that suffering is personal and does not always reflect external circumstances. Furthermore, suffering does not need to qualify or meet any standard in order to be genuine. On top of this, I strongly believe that tribal behavior is exclusive and breeds ignorance.

My life is very good at this moment. However, it hasn't always been easy, and I know that on any given day, it might take a turn for the worse.

Personally, the general dialog doesn't matter too much to me. It is always mostly wrong.

I try my best to look at each person, and to understand them and where they are coming from. IMO when you do this, you will find that most people are happy to do the same. Doing my best, I have found myself surrounded by people that enrich my life. IMHO the discussions that you refer to are fueled by many that are eager to change minds, but few that are eager to listen and to be changed.

Normal may be a genuine burden, or it might be nothing at all. Whatever the case, if you are empathic to those about you, they should want to understand your perspective. If this isn't the case, IMHO it's best to be critical of one's own ability to empathize first. Most often we get something proportional to what we give.

But to answer your last question: I think that victimization can at times become a badge of honor, or work as a banner of belonging. But, I wouldn't guess that this phenomenon is anything new. However, personally, I would stop there. I have no way of knowing whether or not someone is a victim, or really suffering, or not.